WOLF is a 5 track EP, a deep dive into the uncomfortable subject of post natal depression. The Wolf plays the role of the PND and I am akin to Little Red Riding Hood. I am taken over by the Wolf, consumed and destroyed.
After the birth of my 1st child in 2015 I knew I was experiencing PND but never acknowledged it and never sought help. I was diagnosed after the fact. Fast forward 7 years later when I had my 2nd child, the Wolf really came to get me, and I suffered severe PND. This time I sought help and with that help from many health professionals was able to recover.
I am a big believer in talking about mental health and breaking the stigma that goes along with it. That's why I recorded a podcast with local mental health help group Lifeboat SE, in April 2019 and you can listen to it here. I am also proud to be a community ambassador for the group.
Wolf is being recorded in Spain and Argentina, and produced in Spain by Hernan Romero who I have worked with many times before as an accompanist. I record my vocals in my home studio and send them off. All songs are written and the first 4 tracks are finished. We are hopeful that it will be ready to share with the world mid 2023.
In September 2020 I started to get serious about making this album come to life. I got in touch with Hernan Romero in Madrid, who I had worked with many times as he created piano tracks for my songs and remixes. I shared with him the idea of the album, the story behind it and the message I wanted to convey. He was all for it, and wanted to be a part of it.
I set about finalising the song list, I had many, but realised that most of them told the same story over and over again, and I didn't want that. So I condensed and dropped a few tracks, until I settled on the 5
Things are About to Get Dark
Pieces of my Pain
Ready for Up
Feel into You
Take a sneak peak listen here ...
We decide on the first song to start with, Things are About to Get Dark, which will be the opening track on the album. It really sets the scene - it tells of the emotions and experiences that I had a few days after Digby was born in August 2015.
I send Hernan a video with me singing the song, and chatting about my vision for it, the style, the genre, the ideas I have. I also record my guide vocals for musicians to use while recording and Hernan sends me back a rough mix made on electronic instruments. I love where it is heading.
Hernan sends me photos of the drums being recorded, in Argentina by Mati Sabagh. It is exciting to see where and who is bringing my song to life!
Another photo update, as my guitars are being tracked in Madrid. Also pretty excited (and reassured) to see THE BEATLES poster on Nico's studio wall ♩🎸
Through out this time I am also getting updated tracks, which contain my guide vocals I recorded in October. Each time I am excited to hear the changes, love the level of distortion and effects being used on my voice. Hernan and his Production pal Leandro also have ideas on how to shape the song and I love the direction it is going in.
Late December I record my final vocals, the boys request MANY takes and I send them all off for them to pick the best.
I receive the updated track, it has been sent to the Audio Engineer Nacho who has done the final mix. It sounds AMAZING!!! I share it with my close family and all the feedback is brilliant. Most of the people who hear it are musicians so they know what they are talking about! In March 2021 I debut the song at a live performance and the feedback is incredible. Lots of really positive comments. I am excited for the next track!
Moving on to the next track, we select Pieces of my Pain to work on next. This song is about my picking my self up and getting on with life, after many months of adjusting to medication, sessions with psychiatrists and phycologists, and weekly visits from the mental health team in Mount Gambier. This song has an uplifting element to it, and will appear towards the end of the album. I send the boys a video of me messing around with it, and the lyrics/chords. They send back a demo made with electronic instruments on the computer and I am completely blown away. It is beyond all expectations. It is rocky, strong, powerful and uplifting all at the same time. I record guide vocals for them to use moving forward and await the next instalment!
I am excited to get updates from the boys on the live instruments being recording in Madrid for the next track, Pieces of my Pain. Hernan sends me a number of photos and videos of Carlos playing the drums and Nico the guitar tracking. The song is coming together and it is sounding amazing!! It is also this week I find out the exciting news that the song has been selected in the Top 100 of the Listen Up Music Songwriters Competition for 2021. The theme this year was Recovery and I thought this song suited that perfectly. A few weeks later I find out it has made the top 10 in South Australia ! In October I go to Adelaide and perform it live for the 1st time, in the the State Final, which it wins! Unfortunately due to the current massive covid outbreak in Sydney I wont get to go to the National Final in January 2022, but the song will be included on the Finliasts album put together by Listen Up Music. Exciting!
Later this week I receive the final mix to sing my vocals over. I get to work in the next few days to lay down my vocals. A few weeks later the final track is delivered !! 2 down!
Time to start work on the 3rd song, we select Free me. As per usual the boys send me through their ideas for the track, which as per usual I love! This track will be a departure from the regular drums, guitar and bass sound, and it more of a dark disco pop sound. So it will stay with the theme of the album. Free Me is written about wanting to break free from the darkness and dark thoughts that have consumed me in the throws of the depression.
In late December I get the track back and add my vocals. the boys have plans for a 'vocal collage' with backing vocalists and ad lib melodies. Cant wait to see how this one evolves!
The track is coming along very well, I record me vocals and send them back. I have had covid in February so my voice is not really going as great as normal. The boys request me to do another round of takes and I send them back, and wait for the verdict!
I receive the completed track Free Me, it is beyond my expectations. This is also the first track where I have backing vocals from someone other than myself, so that is something my ears, and ego need to get used to hearing!
Time to start the next track, this is the 4th track. it is called Ready for Up. It deals with the time in my recovery that I am starting to feel really good and want to break out of the funk and get back to real life.
As usual the boys send me a stellar demo and i get to work on my vocals.
After I send my first lot of vocals, the boys get in touch with request for me to add some more takes, some harmoneis and so I send them back and wait for the magic to happen! A few weeks later the track is done and I am so happy with this one! Bit of a laid back, but still uplifting vibe.
This could well be the final track, I am not 100% sure yet. It is called Feel into You. It is really upbeat, really positive, about the life I am living and the support I have around me.
I send the boys the ideas I have and wait!