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Elora Viano

UK based photographer

S3 Ep91

Elora Viano

Listen and subscribe on Spotify and itunes/Apple podcasts

My guest this week is Elora Viona, a photographer based in Lincolnshire UK and a mum of 2. Originally from Canada, Elora spent a few years in Italy where she met her husband before moving to the UK.


Growing up Elora loved being creative, but didnt have a natural affinity for drawing or art. She was looking for ways to be creative and express herself, and in high school she discovered photography and she finally found it!


Elora has been photographing since back in the days of film, and has had this as a passionate hobby ever since. Elora enjoys experimenting in her work using different lenses. collages or light leak overlays.


Six years ago she decided to turn it into a business, and got so sucked into making it a success that in the process she had forgotten about her love for personal projects. Having made active changes, she's proud to say she has managed to accomplish a number of personal projects and continue to do so, growing and challenging herself with this medium.


She is a family photographer and enjoys a documentary style, her biggest passion is capturing emotion and movement in her subjects.

Elora has won a number of awards and been published in magazines both in print and online.


Elora's current project Kintsugi Mama aligns the Japanese art of repairing with gold, with stretchmarks, Through this project Elora is exploring the beauty of the so called “scarred” female body. This body where the skin stretches, breaks, and re-heals itself all while bringing a new life to this world – is an incredible feat of mother nature, and yet, somehow, we do not tend to look upon those stretch marks with love, but with distaste, hate even, because they are seen as imperfections. What if, instead of hiding those so called “imperfections” we celebrated them, repaired them with gold, the most precious element of them all? What if we took the time to see how glorious they truly are? Would we see ourselves differently? Would we revel in the power of womanhood?


Elora - Personal Instagram / Website / The Daily Collective Website / Kintsugi project website

Podcast - instagram / website


If today’s episode is triggering for you in any way I encourage you to seek help from those around you, medical professionals or from resources on line. I have compiled a list of great international resources here


Music used with permission from Alemjo my new age and ambient music trio.

When chatting to my guests I greatly appreciate their openness and honestly in sharing their stories. If at any stage their information is found to be incorrect, the podcast bears no responsibility for guests' inaccuracies.

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Podcast transcript at the bottom of the page

Thank you so much for tuning in to this episode of The Art of Being A Mum Podcast. I'm beyond honoured that you're here and would be grateful if you could take 2 minutes to leave me a 5-star review in iTunes or wherever you are listening. It really helps! This way together we can inspire, connect and bring in to the light even more stories from creative mums. Want to connect? Take a screenshot of this episode and share it on Instagram tagging me in with @art_of_being_a_mum_podcast


I can't wait to connect. And remember if you or somebody you know would like to be a guest on the podcast, get in touch! I love meeting and chatting to mammas from all creative backgrounds, from all around the world!

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Thank you!

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Alison acknowledges this Land of the Berrin (Mount Gambier) Region as the Traditional Lands of the Bungandidj People and acknowledge these First Nations people as the custodians of the Region.

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Being a Mum podcast where I, Alison Newman, a singer, songwriter and Aussie mum of two,


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enjoys honest and inspiring conversations with artists and creators about the joys and


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issues they've encountered while trying to be a mum and continue to create.


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You'll hear themes like the mental juggle, changes in identity, how their work's been


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influenced by motherhood, mum guilt, cultural norms and we also stray into territory such


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as the patriarchy, feminism and capitalism.


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You can find links to my guests and topics we discuss in the show notes along with a


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link to the music played, how to get in touch and a link to join our supportive and lively


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community on Instagram.


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I'll always put a trigger warning if we discuss sensitive topics on the podcast but if at


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any time you're concerned about your mental health I urge you to talk to those around


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you, reach out to health professionals or seek out resources online.


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I've compiled a list of international resources which can be accessed on the podcast landing


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page alisonnewman.net slash podcast.


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The art of being a mum would like to acknowledge the traditional owners of the land and water


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which this podcast is recorded on as being the Bowendig people in the Beren region.


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I'm working on land that was never ceded.


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Hello and welcome to another episode of the podcast.


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This week we're up to 91, creeping ever closer to that magical 100.


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This week however my guest is Elora Villano, a photographer based in Lincolnshire in the


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UK and a mum of two.


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Elora's originally from Canada and she spent a few years in Italy where she met her husband


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before moving to the UK.


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Growing up Elora loved being creative but didn't have a natural affinity for drawing


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or painting.


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She was looking for ways to be creative and express herself and in high school she discovered


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photography.


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She finally found what she'd been looking for.


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Elora's been photographing since back in the days of film, the first time around and has


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enjoyed it as a passionate hobby ever since.


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She enjoys experimenting in her work using different lenses, collages or light leak overlays.


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Six years ago Elora decided to turn photography into a business and she got so sucked into


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making it a success in that process that she'd forgotten about her love for her personal


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projects.


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Having made active changes she's proud to say she's managed to accomplish a number of


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personal projects and continues to do so, growing and challenging herself with this


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medium.


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Elora is a family photographer and enjoys a documentary style.


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Her biggest passions are capturing emotion and movement in her subjects.


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She's won a number of awards and been published in magazines both in print and online.


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Elora's current project Kintsuki Mama aligns the Japanese art of repairing with gold,


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with stretch marks.


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Through this project Elora is exploring the beauty of the so called scarred female body,


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the body where the skin stretches, breaks and re-heals itself all while bringing a new


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life into this world.


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It's an incredible feat of mother nature and yet somehow we do not tend to look upon those


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stretch marks with love but with distaste, hate even.


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What if instead of hiding those imperfections we celebrated them, repaired them with gold,


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the most precious element of them all?


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What if we took the time to see how glorious they truly are?


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Would we see ourselves differently?


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Would we revel in the power of womanhood?


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Elora it's lovely to meet you.


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Thank you so much for coming on the podcast.


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Thank you so much for having me.


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It's good to meet you too.


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Yeah it's such a pleasure.


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So we're just chatting before I hit record.


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You're over in the UK and it is the morning there.


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Whereabouts in the UK are you?


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Lincolnshire which is East, Central East Coast type area of the country.


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Yeah right.


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So in relation to London which is about north, mostly where most people know.


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So it's north of London.


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Have you always lived there with your accent?


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No, no my accent is not British.


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It's Canadian.


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Yeah, yes.


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I was born and raised in Canada and then I spent a few years in Italy when I met my husband


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and then we ended up moving here for his work and so far this is where we're staying.


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Yeah right.


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So couldn't be more special than this.


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I'm a photographer, primarily.


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I like to dabble in other things, but just as a hobby, really.


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So I mostly do photography and I also run it as a business with family and personal


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branding here in Lincoln.


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And I also do it as personal work and therapy and just as the storyteller of the family


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as well as doing projects that are close to my heart.


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And I've also recently launched a podcast.


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Oh, exciting!


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Yeah, so it's all on.


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I'm all over the place as usual, doing 400 different things.


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All in good fun.


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Just to keep me busy.


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Yeah, that's awesome.


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Tell us about your style of photography that you like to take.


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I love doing more documentary type photography, so taking pictures as they are.


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My biggest passion is capturing emotion in my images and movement and love and connection


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and joy and just silliness in general.


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I just live for that.


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When I see one of those pictures, it's just like, that's the one for me.


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I also enjoy experimenting a bit with photography on the side, a personal side, using like creative


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lenses or sticking stuff in front of my lenses.


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Occasionally doing photomontage type stuff.


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Not very good, but it's fun to experiment.


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I like to try new things because then I see I can incorporate that into my work if it


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feels like it's in line with me.


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Otherwise I don't.


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Otherwise I just let it go because it's not my thing.


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I learned that the hard way by trying to be what I wasn't.


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I just, with age and maturity, as you do, I just said, you know what, that's not me.


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I've tried, it wasn't for me, I move on.


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Good on you.


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I actually had a bit of a squeeze on your webpage.


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I love that style.


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It's like you're not setting people in positions and poses and all that sort of stage sort


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of style of photography, which I, when I got married, I got married 20 years ago and I


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wanted the style of photography like that, like what you do, like this documentary style


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where you're just capturing things as they happen.


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The tent I live in, we've only got like 30,000 people.


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At that time there was maybe two professional photographers and this was back on the film


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days.


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No one did the style like that.


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It was all stand here and stand here and blah, blah, blah.


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And it's like, I had my time again.


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I probably would have pushed a bit harder.


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But you know, it's become more popular as a style over the last 20 years or so.


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I think it's evolved because there was a very distinct thing between reportage.


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Also like reporters and news things and Magnum photo kind of stuff and what family photography


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was supposed to be.


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So studio imposed and curated and made to look because it was a special occasion.


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But as things have changed, they've kind of all smushed together a lot and it's become


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very nice to see that there's a whole array of different styles for people to choose from


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and they can go with what they're drawn to.


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Yeah, that's so true, isn't it?


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And I love that.


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I think because like when digital came along, it just became so much more accessible to


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so many people.


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And I know, yeah, in where I live, like just about everybody can take photos, like, you


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know, whether they're good or not, it's another story.


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But there are a lot of photographers around now compared to what they used to be.


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Yeah, you're not sure of pretty much everyone's got a good camera these days.


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How did you first get into photography?


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Okay.


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So it's a story of how one person can really influence your life and change it.


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In this case, a teacher.


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I always liked being creative, but I suck at drawing like stick men, barely understandable.


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I mean, my kids draw better than I do.


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Their father, thankfully for them, but you know, I can't say that I'm not a good artist.


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I can't draw.


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I love being creative.


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I love doing crafty things.


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I really wanted to be able to express myself, but I could never find a medium that I liked.


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I kept taking art classes.


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I kept really doing badly at art classes and getting critiqued and getting pushed down,


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but I just kept going until about high school in grade 11, no, grade 12.


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So last year of high school, my art teacher introduced me to photography and she, we had


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a school camera and she gave it to me.


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She showed me how to put the film in, in the black bag, the way you used to do it in the


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olden days.


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And you know, she taught the whole module basically on how to use photography and I


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found it and I was like, it just opened my eyes as to how I could be creative and I could


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do that with people and things and how I see the world and how light is.


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And so I basically never stopped after that.


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I kept going as a hobby.


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You know, I'd take a little camera with me everywhere and photograph my trips, my travels,


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my friends, my family, the cats, everything.


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You know, I had stacks of pictures that I would go to the little one hour photo guy


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and print them out and have it done.


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And then there was a bit of a pause for a while while I was studying at university.


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I just didn't have the time to follow on a lot of hobbies.


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And in that meantime, everything kind of went digital.


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So it was like I had to learn it all again in a way.


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So I picked up a digital camera and I slowly started learning and got into that.


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And I just kept doing it, you know, just practicing and playing around as a hobby, never really


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thinking it could become a business or anything like that until I had my kids.


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And then with my first child, I realized that I wanted to have the flexibility of deciding


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my own times.


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And I was like, I wanted to still do something creative.


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I still wanted to do something I could work around my family.


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And it was like, well, this is pretty clear.


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So I decided to start up my business and that's it really.


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It's been going since then.


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Yeah, right.


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So how long is that?


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How old is that child?


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The oldest one is nine and the youngest is six, going on seven as she likes to point


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out every day.


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Six and a half mommy and only like three months until my birthday.


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You know, that kind of counting it down.


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Yeah, they're so detailed oriented.


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So, so yeah, sorry, I was saying.


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So yeah, it's been first year or so was kind of start and stop because I was learning all


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the things about business.


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And that's where I kind of fell into doing what other people were doing.


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So I thought has to be studio stuff.


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So I had to learn about lighting and backdrops and find a space and posing and and it was


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so hard for me to learn it and just do it.


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And anytime I had a session, the photos I found that I tended to be drawn to the most


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for the outtakes.


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Yeah.


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And and I was like, and I always included them.


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And then, you know, sometimes people wanted that posed look and sometimes they preferred


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the outtakes and and stuff like that.


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And then as I got into it and then I was just I kept on taking like courses and joining


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groups and communities and all that kind of stuff.


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And then I found lifestyle photography and I was like, oh, this is like an in between


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kind of thing.


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And it was being very popular in the States and Canada.


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It was not yet all the rage here.


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It was just starting kind of here in the UK.


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So it took a long time for me to kind of promote and get people to do it.


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But I did a few model calls, got a few model families in, started to change over the website


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and who I was focusing on.


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And in the meantime, we moved.


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So I had a completely new clean slate basically to work on with new clients.


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And I just promoted myself as that and then from lifestyle, I've gone more and more towards


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the documentary approach.


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And that's that seems to be where I have settled right now as it stands from a business standpoint.


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Personally, I've always been documentary.


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So I've always been doing, you know, just taking pictures of things as they are, nature


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00:15:52,580 --> 00:15:56,700

landscapes or people in the street or that kind of thing.


213

00:15:56,700 --> 00:16:02,420

The kids as they were growing and that started me off on a series of personal projects as


214

00:16:02,420 --> 00:16:03,420

well.


215

00:16:03,420 --> 00:16:07,420

And yeah, that's pretty much it summed up.


216

00:16:07,420 --> 00:16:09,420

Yeah, no, that's awesome.


217

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I love that.


218

00:16:11,140 --> 00:16:14,780

Like you mentioned it earlier and then, you know, I'm going into some detail with it now.


219

00:16:14,780 --> 00:16:20,060

But I think a lot of people can relate to that, that when you start something new, there's


220

00:16:20,060 --> 00:16:24,700

this, you have this idea of what it's supposed to be like and you can find yourself sort


221

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of falling into that trap of not listening, maybe not listening to your heart because


222

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you think I've got to do it like that because that seems to be right.


223

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So then it's like, and you knew like, you didn't want to do it like that, but it was


224

00:16:39,300 --> 00:16:41,740

like, yeah, I could feel that it just wasn't my thing.


225

00:16:41,740 --> 00:16:42,740

Yeah.


226

00:16:42,740 --> 00:16:44,140

And I think a lot of people can relate to that.


227

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And it takes a lot of courage and a lot of sort of soul searching to sort of look at


228

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why do I want to do this?


229

00:16:52,300 --> 00:16:55,220

Why the reasons I want to do it that way or this way?


230

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Yeah.


231

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So I love that.


232

00:16:57,220 --> 00:16:58,220

That's really good.


233

00:16:58,220 --> 00:16:59,220

Oh, do you?


234

00:16:59,220 --> 00:17:03,740

I'm just thinking about myself when I say that.


235

00:17:03,740 --> 00:17:04,900

Oh, there you go.


236

00:17:04,900 --> 00:17:08,460

It's just, I know it's just, you know, you just, I don't know.


237

00:17:08,460 --> 00:17:10,460

You second guess yourself so much, I think.


238

00:17:10,460 --> 00:17:14,460

And so you don't trust yourself enough at different times.


239

00:17:14,460 --> 00:17:15,460

Yeah.


240

00:17:15,460 --> 00:17:16,460

So no, anyway.


241

00:17:16,460 --> 00:17:19,460

That's all right.


242

00:17:19,460 --> 00:17:24,140

I think it comes a bit more with age that you kind of just say, screw it, you know,


243

00:17:24,140 --> 00:17:26,420

at a certain point, I'm just going to do what I want to do.


244

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And if people like it, that's great.


245

00:17:27,620 --> 00:17:29,780

If they don't tell, you know, kind of thing.


246

00:17:29,780 --> 00:17:40,060

I think it's come to me as I've gotten older and felt more secure in my skills and my abilities,


247

00:17:40,060 --> 00:17:45,020

I think, and I have learned to say no to things.


248

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And at first I wouldn't, I refused to because I think I need the money.


249

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I need to do this.


250

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I need to practice.


251

00:17:49,540 --> 00:17:56,780

And then I found myself doing a lot of stuff I didn't want to do.


252

00:17:56,780 --> 00:18:01,580

And I was like, nah, life's too short.


253

00:18:01,580 --> 00:18:05,900

And so I've said, no, I have a wonderful network of other local photographers who do all sorts


254

00:18:05,900 --> 00:18:10,980

of different styles and events and types of photography and focusing on things.


255

00:18:10,980 --> 00:18:15,940

And I'm very happy to refer people over to them.


256

00:18:15,940 --> 00:18:20,940

And you know, sometimes we even share clients because they like both kinds of styles and


257

00:18:20,940 --> 00:18:22,380

stuff like that.


258

00:18:22,380 --> 00:18:26,400

So sometimes they go to one for one thing and me for another.


259

00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:27,400

And it's lovely.


260

00:18:27,400 --> 00:18:31,060

You know, it's nice to be able to do that.


261

00:18:31,060 --> 00:18:33,580

I love that.


262

00:18:33,580 --> 00:18:37,660

Something else I think we can get caught up is like that competitiveness.


263

00:18:37,660 --> 00:18:43,380

But when you genuinely sort of settled in yourself, which you obviously are, you can


264

00:18:43,380 --> 00:18:46,700

be open to that and you don't feel threatened by other people.


265

00:18:46,700 --> 00:18:48,740

You know, you're doing what you love.


266

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You're allowing your clients to come to you if they're drawn to that style.


267

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I just think that's awesome.


268

00:18:53,620 --> 00:18:54,620

Good on you.


269

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I love it.


270

00:18:55,620 --> 00:18:56,620

I love that.


271

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And I think, yeah, I agree with that.


272

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It's something that it takes time and experience.


273

00:19:03,700 --> 00:19:08,000

And I feel like I've said this to other people in the podcast, when you get into your forties,


274

00:19:08,000 --> 00:19:10,740

it's literally you do not care anymore.


275

00:19:10,740 --> 00:19:13,660

It's like everyone else can go jump and you're going to do what you want.


276

00:19:13,660 --> 00:19:14,660

Absolutely.


277

00:19:14,660 --> 00:19:18,620

The older I get, the more I'm like, yeah, do what you want.


278

00:19:18,620 --> 00:19:19,620

You do you.


279

00:19:19,620 --> 00:19:20,620

Yeah.


280

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I'm happy with it.


281

00:19:21,620 --> 00:19:22,620

Yeah.


282

00:19:22,620 --> 00:19:23,620

Yeah.


283

00:19:23,620 --> 00:19:51,180

Tell me about the Daily Collective.


284

00:19:51,180 --> 00:19:54,020

Yeah, Daily Collective.


285

00:19:54,020 --> 00:20:01,940

Basically, during lockdown, obviously, I was considered a non-essential service and I couldn't


286

00:20:01,940 --> 00:20:02,940

work.


287

00:20:02,940 --> 00:20:08,100

So I had to find something, you know, do something.


288

00:20:08,100 --> 00:20:12,540

And with my time and between the homeschooling and all the stuff that we all went through


289

00:20:12,540 --> 00:20:22,380

everywhere, I found a lot of wonderful photography communities that really came together.


290

00:20:22,380 --> 00:20:24,460

Some didn't and some did.


291

00:20:24,460 --> 00:20:29,660

And I let go of the ones that didn't and I stick with the ones that did.


292

00:20:29,660 --> 00:20:36,740

And I have found and made some amazing and inspirational friends through these communities.


293

00:20:36,740 --> 00:20:44,860

And so I wanted to create a similar type of community as well, but with a focus on just


294

00:20:44,860 --> 00:20:51,060

personal projects, because there are so many communities for businesses, business and marketing


295

00:20:51,060 --> 00:20:54,660

and a mix of all of it.


296

00:20:54,660 --> 00:21:01,300

But I really wanted to focus on that artistic and creative side to photography.


297

00:21:01,300 --> 00:21:02,740

So I made one rule.


298

00:21:02,740 --> 00:21:08,580

I said, I will share only personal work, so nothing you've done for a client, just for


299

00:21:08,580 --> 00:21:09,580

you.


300

00:21:09,580 --> 00:21:14,260

If it's for you or for a gallery exhibition or, you know, a theme that you're working


301

00:21:14,260 --> 00:21:19,700

towards or something, but it's a personal project that you're doing for you, then that's


302

00:21:19,700 --> 00:21:22,340

what I want to focus on and help with.


303

00:21:22,340 --> 00:21:24,840

So it started out just like as a feature hub.


304

00:21:24,840 --> 00:21:31,540

So I would share a picture every day from a different person who used the tag.


305

00:21:31,540 --> 00:21:36,420

And because that was the 365, so one picture a day for a year.


306

00:21:36,420 --> 00:21:41,380

But then as it kept going, I kept seeing such beautiful stuff.


307

00:21:41,380 --> 00:21:45,020

And so I kind of expanded it into like a membership.


308

00:21:45,020 --> 00:21:48,100

And I was like, you know what?


309

00:21:48,100 --> 00:21:49,100

Screw it.


310

00:21:49,100 --> 00:21:50,100

Let's just do a podcast and talk about it.


311

00:21:50,100 --> 00:21:51,100

So I did it for like 24 hours.


312

00:21:51,100 --> 00:21:52,100

I decided, let's just do that.


313

00:21:52,100 --> 00:21:53,100

And that's it.


314

00:21:53,100 --> 00:21:54,100

I did all my research.


315

00:21:54,100 --> 00:21:55,100

I found all this stuff.


316

00:21:55,100 --> 00:21:56,100

I'm like, that seems easy enough to start a podcast.


317

00:21:56,100 --> 00:21:57,100

And there you go.


318

00:21:57,100 --> 00:21:58,100

And I started just writing out my own story.


319

00:21:58,100 --> 00:21:59,100

And I was like, I'm going to do this.


320

00:21:59,100 --> 00:22:00,100

I'm going to do this.


321

00:22:00,100 --> 00:22:01,100

I'm going to do this.


322

00:22:01,100 --> 00:22:04,620

And I started writing out my little scripts or whatever.


323

00:22:04,620 --> 00:22:06,980

And I was like, so people, this is what I'm doing.


324

00:22:06,980 --> 00:22:07,980

And that was it.


325

00:22:07,980 --> 00:22:08,980

That is so great.


326

00:22:08,980 --> 00:22:16,260

So the Baby Collective has kind of expanded a little bit over the last year or so.


327

00:22:16,260 --> 00:22:22,900

I think I launched it around maybe April last year, April, May.


328

00:22:22,900 --> 00:22:29,260

So it's coming on a year of life, so to speak.


329

00:22:29,260 --> 00:22:33,460

So I've loved seeing the journey as it's expanding.


330

00:22:33,460 --> 00:22:34,460

It's a small community.


331

00:22:34,460 --> 00:22:38,740

It's a tiny community, but I don't mind.


332

00:22:38,740 --> 00:22:41,740

It's great if it expands, the more the merrier.


333

00:22:41,740 --> 00:22:45,540

But I like that it's small also because you get to really know the people that are in


334

00:22:45,540 --> 00:22:50,900

it and get to know their work and see how they express themselves and share that, which


335

00:22:50,900 --> 00:22:53,900

is really lovely.


336

00:22:53,900 --> 00:22:56,340

On the one hand, I'm tempted to just keep it small.


337

00:22:56,340 --> 00:22:59,500

On the other hand, I want it to grow, obviously.


338

00:22:59,500 --> 00:23:02,260

Kind of thing like that.


339

00:23:02,260 --> 00:23:06,820

But I'm hoping to manage to find a balance into letting it grow, but let it feel like


340

00:23:06,820 --> 00:23:15,620

it's close and a safe space for everyone to share their frustrations and their creative


341

00:23:15,620 --> 00:23:23,140

process or ask for advice or feedback or whatever, or just need somewhere to just have a cry


342

00:23:23,140 --> 00:23:28,220

because all creatives, we tend to just have our moments, don't we?


343

00:23:28,220 --> 00:23:33,780

And you just need to get it off your chest sometimes, just write it out and then it just


344

00:23:33,780 --> 00:23:34,780

feels so much better.


345

00:23:34,780 --> 00:23:39,740

And to have someone say, I understand you and I hear that.


346

00:23:39,740 --> 00:23:41,300

It's so powerful for you.


347

00:23:41,300 --> 00:23:43,900

And it's like a balm for the soul.


348

00:23:43,900 --> 00:23:45,020

You're like, now I can go on.


349

00:23:45,020 --> 00:23:49,060

I don't have to obsess about that because someone understands.


350

00:23:49,060 --> 00:23:53,340

And that's what I'd like to keep becoming and growing into.


351

00:23:53,340 --> 00:23:54,340

Yeah.


352

00:23:54,340 --> 00:23:55,340

Oh, great.


353

00:23:55,340 --> 00:23:56,340

Good for you.


354

00:23:56,340 --> 00:23:57,340

I really love that.


355

00:23:57,340 --> 00:24:01,940

And I love that you decided to do your podcast really quickly because that's literally what


356

00:24:01,940 --> 00:24:02,940

I did.


357

00:24:02,940 --> 00:24:05,220

And it's awesome.


358

00:24:05,220 --> 00:24:10,980

I had this conversation with someone on a podcast earlier in the year, or it might have


359

00:24:10,980 --> 00:24:11,980

been last year.


360

00:24:11,980 --> 00:24:12,980

I can't remember now.


361

00:24:12,980 --> 00:24:17,980

But we're talking about how obviously everyone's different and their creative process can be


362

00:24:17,980 --> 00:24:19,660

quite different.


363

00:24:19,660 --> 00:24:26,140

And how some people like you and I, we just get an idea and just go bang and just do it.


364

00:24:26,140 --> 00:24:31,100

And then some people will have to like research and research and prepare and plan.


365

00:24:31,100 --> 00:24:35,900

And it takes a certain amount of months before they're happy to let it go out.


366

00:24:35,900 --> 00:24:42,180

And it's like, I just find it really fascinating just how everyone's way of processing is so


367

00:24:42,180 --> 00:24:43,180

different.


368

00:24:43,180 --> 00:24:44,180

Like, I don't know.


369

00:24:44,180 --> 00:24:45,180

I just, I don't know.


370

00:24:45,180 --> 00:24:47,180

I just find that really, really cool.


371

00:24:47,180 --> 00:24:56,100

And it's probably no reflection on how successful something is or whatever.


372

00:24:56,100 --> 00:25:00,820

It's probably not measurable whether you do it this way or that way, what the end outcome


373

00:25:00,820 --> 00:25:01,820

is.


374

00:25:01,820 --> 00:25:02,820

So it's, I don't know.


375

00:25:02,820 --> 00:25:03,820

Sorry, I'm rambling now.


376

00:25:03,820 --> 00:25:04,820

I'm just kidding.


377

00:25:04,820 --> 00:25:05,820

Don't worry.


378

00:25:05,820 --> 00:25:06,820

I like a good ramble.


379

00:25:06,820 --> 00:25:07,820

Don't worry.


380

00:25:07,820 --> 00:25:08,820

I do it myself a lot.


381

00:25:08,820 --> 00:25:09,820

Oh, do you?


382

00:25:09,820 --> 00:25:10,820

Yeah.


383

00:25:10,820 --> 00:25:11,820

No, there you go.


384

00:25:11,820 --> 00:25:12,820

Well, that's cool.


385

00:25:12,820 --> 00:25:19,020

So I'm going to put the link for your, your predominantly on Instagram with that.


386

00:25:19,020 --> 00:25:20,020

Yeah.


387

00:25:20,020 --> 00:25:21,020

With that one.


388

00:25:21,020 --> 00:25:22,020

Yeah, cool.


389

00:25:22,020 --> 00:25:25,100

So I'll put a, I'll put a hyperlink in the show notes for people if they're interested


390

00:25:25,100 --> 00:25:27,980

in checking that out, because that is really cool.


391

00:25:27,980 --> 00:25:30,820

Inspire and learn a community for personal photography projects.


392

00:25:30,820 --> 00:25:31,820

I love it.


393

00:25:31,820 --> 00:25:33,660

Good on you.


394

00:25:33,660 --> 00:25:37,220

And I also noticed that you're a moderator for a couple of other photography.


395

00:25:37,220 --> 00:25:38,220

Yeah.


396

00:25:38,220 --> 00:25:39,220

Yeah.


397

00:25:39,220 --> 00:25:46,780

Yeah, I find it hard to know what to say on Instagram because it's like, it's not like


398

00:25:46,780 --> 00:25:47,780

a pay.


399

00:25:47,780 --> 00:25:48,780

You know what I mean?


400

00:25:48,780 --> 00:25:49,780

Yeah.


401

00:25:49,780 --> 00:25:50,780

Yeah.


402

00:25:50,780 --> 00:25:53,620

So that were they ones that you discovered through the pandemic as well?


403

00:25:53,620 --> 00:25:54,620

Yes.


404

00:25:54,620 --> 00:25:56,740

Yes, they were.


405

00:25:56,740 --> 00:26:05,620

So the two that I moderate for is flock and flock live and for the love of the photograph.


406

00:26:05,620 --> 00:26:10,540

So flock live is the one that came out just during the pandemic.


407

00:26:10,540 --> 00:26:17,540

It was, it started out as a, it was supposed to be like a show, a photography show, you


408

00:26:17,540 --> 00:26:26,220

know, kind of expo thing, but pandemic put that down and, but it was focused on the kind


409

00:26:26,220 --> 00:26:27,860

of photography that I love.


410

00:26:27,860 --> 00:26:28,860

Yeah.


411

00:26:28,860 --> 00:26:34,780

A lot of the shows that they have are very much like post newborns and their props and


412

00:26:34,780 --> 00:26:37,140

backdrops and business.


413

00:26:37,140 --> 00:26:41,780

And there isn't a lot of space for personal stuff.


414

00:26:41,780 --> 00:26:45,620

And this one seemed like it was going to be different already from the outset.


415

00:26:45,620 --> 00:26:47,420

So I was 100%.


416

00:26:47,420 --> 00:26:49,740

I was like their number one fan everywhere.


417

00:26:49,740 --> 00:26:53,380

I was totally fan girling over the whole thing.


418

00:26:53,380 --> 00:26:59,420

And then as the community grew and stuff overlocked down and I just wanted to become a part of


419

00:26:59,420 --> 00:27:00,420

it.


420

00:27:00,420 --> 00:27:05,620

And they asked for moderators for their Instagram and stuff like that.


421

00:27:05,620 --> 00:27:12,620

I jumped on board and I've been doing so since it has quieted down a lot now from the way


422

00:27:12,620 --> 00:27:14,620

it was, most of the groups have.


423

00:27:14,620 --> 00:27:16,620

Yeah, just the nature.


424

00:27:16,620 --> 00:27:19,980

Back to normal life, haven't we?


425

00:27:19,980 --> 00:27:25,420

But it's still for me, it was a very important part of my sanity during lockdown and a creative


426

00:27:25,420 --> 00:27:27,820

outlet and the community for me.


427

00:27:27,820 --> 00:27:31,380

And so I really wanted to give back in that way.


428

00:27:31,380 --> 00:27:38,660

And For the Love of the Photograph is actually based on a book that another photographer


429

00:27:38,660 --> 00:27:44,980

who's based in New Zealand, she wrote Chloe Lodge and she just wrote this book and it


430

00:27:44,980 --> 00:27:50,420

was all about personal photography and capturing your everyday and seeing the light and just


431

00:27:50,420 --> 00:27:53,340

letting it speak to you and having a slow process.


432

00:27:53,340 --> 00:27:56,060

And she started a group and of course the Instagram page.


433

00:27:56,060 --> 00:27:59,580

Of course I was also fangirling over that.


434

00:27:59,580 --> 00:28:04,620

And when she was looking for moderators and stuff, she asked, I was like, yes, absolutely.


435

00:28:04,620 --> 00:28:07,860

So I joined in on that as well.


436

00:28:07,860 --> 00:28:11,700

I am part of other groups as well, but I can't do everything.


437

00:28:11,700 --> 00:28:14,700

So I had to stop myself.


438

00:28:14,700 --> 00:28:19,740

Oh yeah, I know.


439

00:28:19,740 --> 00:28:24,740

It's hard to, is there, oh, this is what we're talking about this morning when I was chatting


440

00:28:24,740 --> 00:28:29,300

to someone else was this, we've got lists of things we want to do and there's only so


441

00:28:29,300 --> 00:28:34,500

much time that we've got, you know, and it's hard to pick the things to focus on.


442

00:28:34,500 --> 00:28:36,740

It's hard to weed it out.


443

00:28:36,740 --> 00:28:38,580

My list is extensively long.


444

00:28:38,580 --> 00:28:40,540

I actually, I'm going to record a podcast.


445

00:28:40,540 --> 00:28:45,980

I have written, I need to record a podcast about like the craziness of the creative mind


446

00:28:45,980 --> 00:28:54,100

and all the way that your thoughts from one thing can just become this huge thing.


447

00:28:54,100 --> 00:28:57,540

So yeah, that's funny that you mentioned that as well.


448

00:28:57,540 --> 00:29:00,980

It's just like, oh my gosh, it's like the list is so long.


449

00:29:00,980 --> 00:29:07,940

It's a book of its own of things that you want to do and learn and try and experiment


450

00:29:07,940 --> 00:29:10,100

and try and do it.


451

00:29:10,100 --> 00:29:12,500

It's just like, yeah, it really is.


452

00:29:12,500 --> 00:29:13,500

Isn't it?


453

00:29:13,500 --> 00:29:19,420

I find that sometimes I get a lot of my ideas in the shower or when I'm swimming, like there's


454

00:29:19,420 --> 00:29:25,660

something about being in water or movement that gets, I don't know, my ideas come really


455

00:29:25,660 --> 00:29:30,260

easily and often I'll like be in the shower and think, oh, that's a good idea for a song


456

00:29:30,260 --> 00:29:33,820

or I'll get a tune in my head and I'll have to jump out and quickly like record on my


457

00:29:33,820 --> 00:29:39,020

phone or quickly make notes and like, oh, I'm so, you know, inspired and invigorated.


458

00:29:39,020 --> 00:29:43,060

And then I go, oh, now I've got to go make the lunches for school, you know, just back


459

00:29:43,060 --> 00:29:44,060

to reality.


460

00:29:44,060 --> 00:29:48,740

That's the thing I find hardest when you get in a tangent or you're on a roll and then


461

00:29:48,740 --> 00:29:51,660

it's like you've brought back to earth so quickly.


462

00:29:51,660 --> 00:29:52,660

Yeah.


463

00:29:52,660 --> 00:29:55,660

By the scream of, Mum, I'm hungry.


464

00:29:55,660 --> 00:29:56,660

Yeah.


465

00:29:56,660 --> 00:29:57,660

That's mine usually.


466

00:29:57,660 --> 00:30:25,580

Oh, dear.


467

00:30:25,580 --> 00:30:28,020

So speaking of, Mum, I'm hungry.


468

00:30:28,020 --> 00:30:29,020

So you've got two children.


469

00:30:29,020 --> 00:30:32,020

That's a great segue, wasn't it?


470

00:30:32,020 --> 00:30:33,020

Sorry.


471

00:30:33,020 --> 00:30:35,460

So have you got two girls or a boy to girl?


472

00:30:35,460 --> 00:30:36,460

Two girls.


473

00:30:36,460 --> 00:30:37,460

Two girls.


474

00:30:37,460 --> 00:30:38,460

Well, that's fun.


475

00:30:38,460 --> 00:30:39,460

I haven't got any girls.


476

00:30:39,460 --> 00:30:40,460

I got two boys.


477

00:30:40,460 --> 00:30:41,460

There you go.


478

00:30:41,460 --> 00:30:44,460

It's either all or nothing.


479

00:30:44,460 --> 00:30:45,860

Oh, dear.


480

00:30:45,860 --> 00:30:56,260

So do you girls see that you do things for yourself that don't involve the mothering


481

00:30:56,260 --> 00:30:57,260

role?


482

00:30:57,260 --> 00:31:02,020

I guess your nine-year-old would probably be aware that you're, you know, you're a


483

00:31:02,020 --> 00:31:04,500

photographer and you do all these other really cool things.


484

00:31:04,500 --> 00:31:10,140

Is it important to you that they see that, that you still have an identity that's not


485

00:31:10,140 --> 00:31:11,140

related to them?


486

00:31:11,140 --> 00:31:12,140

Absolutely.


487

00:31:12,140 --> 00:31:13,140

In a nice way.


488

00:31:13,140 --> 00:31:14,140

Yeah.


489

00:31:14,140 --> 00:31:15,140

No, no, absolutely.


490

00:31:15,140 --> 00:31:18,260

I know exactly what you mean.


491

00:31:18,260 --> 00:31:23,140

And it is important for me to do that and have my space.


492

00:31:23,140 --> 00:31:25,540

I've always been a person that has needed her space.


493

00:31:25,540 --> 00:31:27,300

I love being with people.


494

00:31:27,300 --> 00:31:34,660

I call myself an extroverted introvert because I do enjoy being with people.


495

00:31:34,660 --> 00:31:36,820

I love being part of communities.


496

00:31:36,820 --> 00:31:42,340

I love going out and being creative and learning things and exploring things and travelling


497

00:31:42,340 --> 00:31:45,620

and seeing things and, you know, living life.


498

00:31:45,620 --> 00:31:47,180

But I also need time to recharge.


499

00:31:47,180 --> 00:31:51,660

And I always have needed times for me where it's just me alone.


500

00:31:51,660 --> 00:31:56,300

And even as a kid, I needed my space as a teenager, same thing.


501

00:31:56,300 --> 00:32:00,460

I always needed to like have a space where I could lock myself in and just do something


502

00:32:00,460 --> 00:32:05,860

for me, which usually ended up being something creative.


503

00:32:05,860 --> 00:32:13,020

But I kind of lost that for a while, especially when the girls were really little.


504

00:32:13,020 --> 00:32:18,540

It was just either I was mom and between naps, I was trying to get this business off the


505

00:32:18,540 --> 00:32:22,380

ground and then it was kids and then it was the business and then it was the kids and


506

00:32:22,380 --> 00:32:23,380

then it was the business.


507

00:32:23,380 --> 00:32:24,380

And that's all it was.


508

00:32:24,380 --> 00:32:27,180

It was either work or family.


509

00:32:27,180 --> 00:32:32,140

And for a while there and I was like at a certain point, I was like, I need something.


510

00:32:32,140 --> 00:32:34,300

I need to do creative outlet.


511

00:32:34,300 --> 00:32:36,340

I need to do something for me.


512

00:32:36,340 --> 00:32:41,500

And although I was doing like little photo project kind of mini things for me, like taking,


513

00:32:41,500 --> 00:32:45,820

you know, I have a 365 project, which is a photo a day basically.


514

00:32:45,820 --> 00:32:48,820

And then I put it in a little album at the end of the year.


515

00:32:48,820 --> 00:32:51,340

And it's just like the year in review kind of thing.


516

00:32:51,340 --> 00:32:58,940

So I was still I was kind of doing that, but I wasn't really doing anything else for me.


517

00:32:58,940 --> 00:33:06,140

So as soon as my oldest one started school, because here they start at four years old


518

00:33:06,140 --> 00:33:07,140

reception.


519

00:33:07,140 --> 00:33:12,020

It's like kindergarten kind of thing at four years old.


520

00:33:12,020 --> 00:33:15,140

And then the other one was starting preschool.


521

00:33:15,140 --> 00:33:19,140

So she was at nursery three days a week doing like preschool things.


522

00:33:19,140 --> 00:33:22,220

I found myself with more time.


523

00:33:22,220 --> 00:33:28,660

And first I threw it all into getting the business really going and self-sustaining.


524

00:33:28,660 --> 00:33:31,900

And I didn't time any of that for me.


525

00:33:31,900 --> 00:33:35,660

And I just work, work, work, work, work when they were there kids.


526

00:33:35,660 --> 00:33:36,940

But then I said, you know what?


527

00:33:36,940 --> 00:33:37,940

Damn it.


528

00:33:37,940 --> 00:33:39,660

I need 10 minutes for myself.


529

00:33:39,660 --> 00:33:42,420

So I started to go on a walk outside.


530

00:33:42,420 --> 00:33:44,940

I took my camera and I go we're in the countryside.


531

00:33:44,940 --> 00:33:50,380

We're in a small village, got tons of fields out there right now.


532

00:33:50,380 --> 00:33:53,700

And so I was like, I'm just going for a walk.


533

00:33:53,700 --> 00:33:55,700

And I felt so good.


534

00:33:55,700 --> 00:34:00,580

I started with 10 minutes, 10 minutes.


535

00:34:00,580 --> 00:34:06,460

And you know, I would do it when the kids were away, when they weren't around.


536

00:34:06,460 --> 00:34:14,580

But as things started to progress, I started to pick up and learn new creative things,


537

00:34:14,580 --> 00:34:15,580

new hobbies.


538

00:34:15,580 --> 00:34:16,580

Like I learned macrame.


539

00:34:16,580 --> 00:34:17,580

Yeah, yeah.


540

00:34:17,580 --> 00:34:21,060

Yeah, I learned how to macrame.


541

00:34:21,060 --> 00:34:25,540

And so I would sit down on the weekends and say to the kids, mommy's doing some crafty


542

00:34:25,540 --> 00:34:26,540

stuff.


543

00:34:26,540 --> 00:34:30,980

And I would macrame some wall hanging or something like that on the weekends.


544

00:34:30,980 --> 00:34:33,180

And they would watch me sometimes.


545

00:34:33,180 --> 00:34:35,300

And I was like, this is mommy time.


546

00:34:35,300 --> 00:34:42,220

And so I started to put that thing down there that this was mommy time.


547

00:34:42,220 --> 00:34:49,020

And it's slowly evolved into having an actual day in my schedule where it's my personal


548

00:34:49,020 --> 00:34:50,020

day.


549

00:34:50,020 --> 00:34:51,020

I love it.


550

00:34:51,020 --> 00:34:52,020

Yeah.


551

00:34:52,020 --> 00:34:54,900

So every Thursday is where I do stuff for me.


552

00:34:54,900 --> 00:34:57,260

So I go to my yoga lesson.


553

00:34:57,260 --> 00:35:05,840

I work on either a personal photography project or I work on learning a new skill on my long


554

00:35:05,840 --> 00:35:09,580

list of creative things I want to learn how to do.


555

00:35:09,580 --> 00:35:13,100

So I'll spend that's my time while they're at school.


556

00:35:13,100 --> 00:35:14,380

That's my time.


557

00:35:14,380 --> 00:35:19,760

And then on the weekends, I will, you know, I'll say I need an hour to work on my cross


558

00:35:19,760 --> 00:35:22,620

stitch or whatever I've been working on as a project.


559

00:35:22,620 --> 00:35:23,620

And they see me.


560

00:35:23,620 --> 00:35:24,620

I go off.


561

00:35:24,620 --> 00:35:25,620

I'm doing my own thing.


562

00:35:25,620 --> 00:35:29,380

And sometimes I involve them because especially with the older one, we have a lot of things


563

00:35:29,380 --> 00:35:36,220

in common that we like to do, like being out in nature and learning about natural things,


564

00:35:36,220 --> 00:35:37,220

foraging.


565

00:35:37,220 --> 00:35:40,380

So she'll come with me and we'll like forage some food and then we'll make it together


566

00:35:40,380 --> 00:35:43,820

and stuff like that, which I started for me.


567

00:35:43,820 --> 00:35:45,340

But then she seems involved in it.


568

00:35:45,340 --> 00:35:48,500

And I said to her, this is good because this is for you as well.


569

00:35:48,500 --> 00:35:51,260

And she's doing it without her sister, but without her friends.


570

00:35:51,260 --> 00:35:53,420

This is her thing that she likes to do.


571

00:35:53,420 --> 00:35:58,800

And I'm trying to also encourage my youngest slowly because she's still very young to kind


572

00:35:58,800 --> 00:36:00,580

of find her own thing as well.


573

00:36:00,580 --> 00:36:04,220

And it's just something that she likes and it's for her, but she doesn't have to do with


574

00:36:04,220 --> 00:36:08,940

her sister or her friends or me or her father or anyone.


575

00:36:08,940 --> 00:36:13,220

And yeah, so that's kind of how it's evolved.


576

00:36:13,220 --> 00:36:17,660

And so as it stands now, I have a day which I dedicate to things for me.


577

00:36:17,660 --> 00:36:18,660

And that's it.


578

00:36:18,660 --> 00:36:19,660

Good on you.


579

00:36:19,660 --> 00:36:25,540

And I love that you're instilling that in your girls from a young age that it's important


580

00:36:25,540 --> 00:36:46,700

to have that, you know, that thing that is yours.


581

00:36:46,700 --> 00:37:00,620

Did you find that when you weren't getting that time to do your own personal creativity,


582

00:37:00,620 --> 00:37:06,380

did you feel like your own identity was literally being taken away from you or threatened?


583

00:37:06,380 --> 00:37:10,620

I felt like I was just mom, mom or Elora the photographer.


584

00:37:10,620 --> 00:37:12,820

But I wasn't Elora.


585

00:37:12,820 --> 00:37:15,100

I was just mom.


586

00:37:15,100 --> 00:37:22,580

And yeah, and so I really, I felt like I was going down in this spiral of just stress and


587

00:37:22,580 --> 00:37:23,580

anxiety.


588

00:37:23,580 --> 00:37:27,340

I mean, I've always been a kind of anxious person, but you know, it was just getting


589

00:37:27,340 --> 00:37:28,340

worse.


590

00:37:28,340 --> 00:37:32,900

And I realized that there was one thing that had changed in my life besides becoming a


591

00:37:32,900 --> 00:37:34,660

mom.


592

00:37:34,660 --> 00:37:38,580

And it was that I had no space for me.


593

00:37:38,580 --> 00:37:43,380

So I started with those tiny little walks and I expanded it from there.


594

00:37:43,380 --> 00:37:47,340

And now I have a good check of time that's for me and I'm happy with that.


595

00:37:47,340 --> 00:37:54,460

And I feel like I am more balanced and I am a better mom to them as a consequence, because


596

00:37:54,460 --> 00:37:57,860

when it's time to be with them, I am with them.


597

00:37:57,860 --> 00:38:02,340

All of me is with them.


598

00:38:02,340 --> 00:38:07,580

And if you're anything like me, you feel quite sort of regulated and settled because you've


599

00:38:07,580 --> 00:38:10,180

had your needs met in the way that you need them.


600

00:38:10,180 --> 00:38:15,780

Like that sort of analogy of like your cup's full, like you can't pour from an empty cup.


601

00:38:15,780 --> 00:38:16,780

I just, I don't know.


602

00:38:16,780 --> 00:38:17,780

Do you feel that way?


603

00:38:17,780 --> 00:38:18,780

Yeah, no, I agree.


604

00:38:18,780 --> 00:38:27,380

Because, you know, for some people, it's like a spa day is what helps them to recharge and


605

00:38:27,380 --> 00:38:28,380

do their thing.


606

00:38:28,380 --> 00:38:29,380

That's not me.


607

00:38:29,380 --> 00:38:30,380

I am not.


608

00:38:30,380 --> 00:38:31,380

I get bored.


609

00:38:31,380 --> 00:38:32,380

I like it once in a while.


610

00:38:32,380 --> 00:38:33,380

Don't get me wrong.


611

00:38:33,380 --> 00:38:37,820

But the idea of going and having my nails done and stuff like that, it's just like,


612

00:38:37,820 --> 00:38:39,820

I've got better stuff to do with my time.


613

00:38:39,820 --> 00:38:40,820

Yeah.


614

00:38:40,820 --> 00:38:42,820

You've got a big long list of things you want to do.


615

00:38:42,820 --> 00:38:49,420

Yeah, I'd rather spend that on craft supplies, like, duh.


616

00:38:49,420 --> 00:38:52,420

Painting something else rather than someone painting your nails.


617

00:38:52,420 --> 00:38:54,420

No, I love that.


618

00:38:54,420 --> 00:38:56,420

No, good on you.


619

00:38:56,420 --> 00:38:58,420

We all have our things.


620

00:38:58,420 --> 00:38:59,420

Yeah.


621

00:38:59,420 --> 00:39:03,900

And that whole idea of actually communicating your needs, I feel like that's something that


622

00:39:03,900 --> 00:39:10,140

perhaps I might be generalizing, but women seem to not be that good at doing because


623

00:39:10,140 --> 00:39:12,860

we have all these expectations of what we're supposed to be.


624

00:39:12,860 --> 00:39:16,860

Society and the patriarchy encourages us to be a particular way.


625

00:39:16,860 --> 00:39:21,140

And so we think, oh, if I say that I need help with something or I want something, it's


626

00:39:21,140 --> 00:39:27,020

almost like we're not living up to that idealized, I'm putting these in air quotes, like this


627

00:39:27,020 --> 00:39:29,100

way we're supposed to be.


628

00:39:29,100 --> 00:39:30,100

Yeah.


629

00:39:30,100 --> 00:39:33,460

Do you feel like that's a fair assumption?


630

00:39:33,460 --> 00:39:34,780

Oh, I've had that.


631

00:39:34,780 --> 00:39:35,780

I've had that.


632

00:39:35,780 --> 00:39:41,940

And I still have moments where I have that, like the house is a bomb.


633

00:39:41,940 --> 00:39:44,420

I love looking at interior decorating magazines.


634

00:39:44,420 --> 00:39:51,500

Like, ah, the houses are so pretty and the color palette and it's so tidy and all these


635

00:39:51,500 --> 00:39:52,860

ideas for organization.


636

00:39:52,860 --> 00:39:55,220

I'm like, yeah, I'm totally doing that.


637

00:39:55,220 --> 00:39:57,220

And I'll buy all the stuff.


638

00:39:57,220 --> 00:40:02,420

I'll spend a whole day reorganizing the bookshelf only for three days later to look like it


639

00:40:02,420 --> 00:40:05,220

did before because nobody uses the system.


640

00:40:05,220 --> 00:40:09,380

And it's like, why am I incapable of doing that?


641

00:40:09,380 --> 00:40:13,500

Or just like the laundry kids ran out of uniforms.


642

00:40:13,500 --> 00:40:16,700

I'm like crap, just Febreze one from before.


643

00:40:16,700 --> 00:40:17,940

I can't do it.


644

00:40:17,940 --> 00:40:22,100

And then you see all the kids with their uniforms pressed and perfect and you're like, damn


645

00:40:22,100 --> 00:40:24,700

it, I suck at being a mom.


646

00:40:24,700 --> 00:40:26,380

And stuff like that.


647

00:40:26,380 --> 00:40:27,820

Or various things.


648

00:40:27,820 --> 00:40:33,540

I've forgotten to bring things into school or donate money for this or forgotten to take


649

00:40:33,540 --> 00:40:36,700

a child to this after school.


650

00:40:36,700 --> 00:40:37,700

All these things.


651

00:40:37,700 --> 00:40:39,420

And I'm like, I suck.


652

00:40:39,420 --> 00:40:40,420

I'm so bad.


653

00:40:40,420 --> 00:40:41,420

I am the worst mom ever.


654

00:40:41,420 --> 00:40:42,420

Oh my God.


655

00:40:42,420 --> 00:40:43,420

How many people do it?


656

00:40:43,420 --> 00:40:46,420

What's wrong with me that I can't do it?


657

00:40:46,420 --> 00:40:48,620

All these things.


658

00:40:48,620 --> 00:40:49,620

I get those moments.


659

00:40:49,620 --> 00:40:52,140

And then there's other days when I say, you know what?


660

00:40:52,140 --> 00:40:53,820

I only have 24 hours in a day.


661

00:40:53,820 --> 00:40:57,540

I need to sleep six, seven, preferably eight of them.


662

00:40:57,540 --> 00:41:04,900

And if I take away my actual work hours and I take away this and that, there's only this


663

00:41:04,900 --> 00:41:07,860

much left and I can only handle so much in my brain.


664

00:41:07,860 --> 00:41:08,860

And that's it.


665

00:41:08,860 --> 00:41:11,420

If it doesn't get done, I apologize to the kids.


666

00:41:11,420 --> 00:41:14,100

I'm like, kids, I'm sorry.


667

00:41:14,100 --> 00:41:15,100

Mommy didn't get to it.


668

00:41:15,100 --> 00:41:17,100

You'll have to just adjust.


669

00:41:17,100 --> 00:41:19,780

Next time maybe mommy will be better.


670

00:41:19,780 --> 00:41:20,780

You know?


671

00:41:20,780 --> 00:41:24,100

But even it's like, it's life, isn't it?


672

00:41:24,100 --> 00:41:26,340

Like there's just so much being thrown at us.


673

00:41:26,340 --> 00:41:30,740

And I feel like this, the mental load, which people are using this term a lot now, it's


674

00:41:30,740 --> 00:41:32,300

the perfect way to describe it.


675

00:41:32,300 --> 00:41:38,660

It's literally, you know, I used to wonder, you know, until I knew what that word meant


676

00:41:38,660 --> 00:41:43,540

or what, you know, the description behind it, I didn't know that's what I was feeling.


677

00:41:43,540 --> 00:41:47,340

When I got that description of what it is, I went, oh my God, no wonder I can't concentrate.


678

00:41:47,340 --> 00:41:48,540

No wonder I get distracted.


679

00:41:48,540 --> 00:41:54,140

No wonder, you know, things fall off the earth because there's just so much going on in my


680

00:41:54,140 --> 00:41:55,140

head.


681

00:41:55,140 --> 00:41:58,940

Whether I'm doing stuff or not, this head thing doesn't ever stop.


682

00:41:58,940 --> 00:42:01,100

You're always thinking, it stops.


683

00:42:01,100 --> 00:42:02,100

It's just insane.


684

00:42:02,100 --> 00:42:06,620

Swearing me out, just talking about it.


685

00:42:06,620 --> 00:42:09,020

Oh man.


686

00:42:09,020 --> 00:42:10,020

Yeah.


687

00:42:10,020 --> 00:42:13,020

No, no, no.


688

00:42:13,020 --> 00:42:16,580

Modern life, I guess, but anyway.


689

00:42:16,580 --> 00:42:17,580

So yeah, that's good.


690

00:42:17,580 --> 00:42:19,940

Cause I like to talk about identity.


691

00:42:19,940 --> 00:42:23,740

So I'm glad we've talked about that and I can definitely relate to what you're saying.


692

00:42:23,740 --> 00:42:27,060

I'm the sort of person that I need a lot of time on my own.


693

00:42:27,060 --> 00:42:28,060

Like same thing.


694

00:42:28,060 --> 00:42:29,060

I love being with people.


695

00:42:29,060 --> 00:42:30,060

I love socializing.


696

00:42:30,060 --> 00:42:36,980

I love doing stuff and going places, but damn, I need a bit of time to, to recompress, recompress


697

00:42:36,980 --> 00:42:39,900

afterwards.


698

00:42:39,900 --> 00:42:40,900

Just doing nothing.


699

00:42:40,900 --> 00:42:45,580

Actually, there was a post I shared on my Instagram a couple of days ago about like


700

00:42:45,580 --> 00:42:48,800

creative people need time to do nothing.


701

00:42:48,800 --> 00:42:51,380

It's literally a requirement of the creative brain.


702

00:42:51,380 --> 00:42:52,380

Yeah.


703

00:42:52,380 --> 00:42:56,020

So that's what I remind myself if I'm feeling like, Oh, I probably should fold that washing.


704

00:42:56,020 --> 00:42:58,260

It's like, no, you need time to just do nothing.


705

00:42:58,260 --> 00:42:59,260

It's okay.


706

00:42:59,260 --> 00:43:00,260

Yep.


707

00:43:00,260 --> 00:43:01,260

Just lay on the bed.


708

00:43:01,260 --> 00:43:27,860

Yeah.


709

00:43:27,860 --> 00:43:32,060

That actually brings me to another topic that I really like to talk to moms about, which


710

00:43:32,060 --> 00:43:34,020

is this whole mom guilt thing.


711

00:43:34,020 --> 00:43:36,700

And I'm putting that in air quotes again.


712

00:43:36,700 --> 00:43:44,180

Do you have any thoughts or feelings about the mom guilt conundrum?


713

00:43:44,180 --> 00:43:45,620

Conundrum, yeah.


714

00:43:45,620 --> 00:43:48,900

Mom guilt is real.


715

00:43:48,900 --> 00:43:49,900

There is no doubt.


716

00:43:49,900 --> 00:43:53,380

It's not just stuff that's made up.


717

00:43:53,380 --> 00:43:58,780

You know, it's a societal pressure to do it all and do it perfectly.


718

00:43:58,780 --> 00:44:04,460

And there are other moms who appear to do it all.


719

00:44:04,460 --> 00:44:08,900

But what we don't see is the stuff that they're struggling with on the other end, you know,


720

00:44:08,900 --> 00:44:14,820

so they're doing great on one side, but are they really doing great on the other?


721

00:44:14,820 --> 00:44:21,980

And I think it's something that I think it comes naturally as us because once you become


722

00:44:21,980 --> 00:44:24,900

a mother, it's like you change, right?


723

00:44:24,900 --> 00:44:32,220

You are, you become more nurturing and caring and you worry more.


724

00:44:32,220 --> 00:44:38,700

You worry more about your offspring because that's, I think, mother nature's way.


725

00:44:38,700 --> 00:44:40,620

That's how we survive as a species.


726

00:44:40,620 --> 00:44:44,980

We need to take care of our little ones so they can grow up and continue to procreate


727

00:44:44,980 --> 00:44:46,460

and keep the species going.


728

00:44:46,460 --> 00:44:52,660

And I think that something happens inside of us to most people.


729

00:44:52,660 --> 00:44:55,700

Not everyone's cut out to be a mom and that's your choice, right?


730

00:44:55,700 --> 00:45:03,780

But for most people, you tend to want to take care of and make everything perfect for your


731

00:45:03,780 --> 00:45:04,780

little people.


732

00:45:04,780 --> 00:45:07,300

You want to do the right thing.


733

00:45:07,300 --> 00:45:09,380

But what is the right thing?


734

00:45:09,380 --> 00:45:15,060

Because 10 different people will tell you 10 different things is the right thing.


735

00:45:15,060 --> 00:45:19,260

Like I think about when I was pregnant and I was researching and I was like, should I


736

00:45:19,260 --> 00:45:20,260

breastfeed?


737

00:45:20,260 --> 00:45:21,260

Should I not breastfeed?


738

00:45:21,260 --> 00:45:22,260

Is formula better?


739

00:45:22,260 --> 00:45:23,500

Is breast milk better?


740

00:45:23,500 --> 00:45:24,500

What happens if?


741

00:45:24,500 --> 00:45:25,500

What happens if?


742

00:45:25,500 --> 00:45:26,500

Blah, blah, blah.


743

00:45:26,500 --> 00:45:27,500

What's this probe?


744

00:45:27,500 --> 00:45:28,500

What's this con?


745

00:45:28,500 --> 00:45:32,260

And my head exploded and that was even before she was born.


746

00:45:32,260 --> 00:45:38,020

And then I made my choices and I managed with difficulty to go through that with the


747

00:45:38,020 --> 00:45:39,780

first one, especially.


748

00:45:39,780 --> 00:45:44,900

I wanted to breastfeed and I had trouble with my milk because we had a bit of a fun birth.


749

00:45:44,900 --> 00:45:49,020

So it was all things, but I persisted and we managed and then, you know, and then that


750

00:45:49,020 --> 00:45:52,980

screwed me over when she was older because I couldn't send her to nursery for a full


751

00:45:52,980 --> 00:45:55,860

day because she refused to take anything from milk in a bottle.


752

00:45:55,860 --> 00:45:56,860

Yeah.


753

00:45:56,860 --> 00:46:00,660

Even if it was my milk and I expressed it and I gave it to her in a bottle.


754

00:46:00,660 --> 00:46:01,660

Nope.


755

00:46:01,660 --> 00:46:02,660

Neither of them took bottles ever.


756

00:46:02,660 --> 00:46:06,100

So I screwed myself over in a way.


757

00:46:06,100 --> 00:46:09,380

But I felt at the time that that's what I should do.


758

00:46:09,380 --> 00:46:13,580

But then there was people like even my own mother, she's like, oh, just put some formula


759

00:46:13,580 --> 00:46:15,500

in a bottle, stick some pavlova in it.


760

00:46:15,500 --> 00:46:16,500

That's what I did with you.


761

00:46:16,500 --> 00:46:21,340

And I'm like, I'm like, you know, mom, things have changed.


762

00:46:21,340 --> 00:46:24,980

It's different parenting, isn't it?


763

00:46:24,980 --> 00:46:26,180

I prefer it this way.


764

00:46:26,180 --> 00:46:28,060

She's like, ah, rod for your own back.


765

00:46:28,060 --> 00:46:31,300

You know, the old saying, right?


766

00:46:31,300 --> 00:46:35,460

But you know, even within my own family, I had, you know, my mother-in-law saying one


767

00:46:35,460 --> 00:46:39,660

thing, my own mom saying another, my friend saying this, you know, my sister-in-law, that


768

00:46:39,660 --> 00:46:46,900

that friends this, you know, internet saying 400,000 things, the leading expert, the nurse,


769

00:46:46,900 --> 00:46:50,580

the midwife, everyone said something different.


770

00:46:50,580 --> 00:46:54,660

And it's like, you're going to feel guilty no matter what you choose.


771

00:46:54,660 --> 00:46:55,940

There's no other way.


772

00:46:55,940 --> 00:47:02,500

Yeah, because it's set up that way that no matter what you choose between A to Z, one


773

00:47:02,500 --> 00:47:06,020

of those things is going to be wrong for someone and you're going to feel guilty about it.


774

00:47:06,020 --> 00:47:08,020

And they're going to make you feel guilty about it.


775

00:47:08,020 --> 00:47:12,460

And for years and years, I let the guilt take over.


776

00:47:12,460 --> 00:47:17,460

I, you know, I said, you know, I have, I still have moments now where I'm like, oh, I'm such


777

00:47:17,460 --> 00:47:20,940

a terrible mom because I forgot this or forgot that.


778

00:47:20,940 --> 00:47:24,780

And then I'm trying to physically stop myself.


779

00:47:24,780 --> 00:47:32,340

You know, I'm really consciously trying to eradicate that guilt out of it because I realized


780

00:47:32,340 --> 00:47:34,660

that I say it out loud.


781

00:47:34,660 --> 00:47:37,500

You know, I'm like, oh, I'm such a bad mom.


782

00:47:37,500 --> 00:47:38,860

I totally forgot.


783

00:47:38,860 --> 00:47:40,780

I'm so sorry, kids.


784

00:47:40,780 --> 00:47:45,020

You know, mommy will try better next time.


785

00:47:45,020 --> 00:47:47,180

And then I'm like, I'm a bad mom?


786

00:47:47,180 --> 00:47:48,980

Why am I feeling guilty?


787

00:47:48,980 --> 00:47:53,060

Because I had to work and I couldn't take them to this birthday party or whatever.


788

00:47:53,060 --> 00:47:55,300

You know, I'm not bad.


789

00:47:55,300 --> 00:48:00,920

I happen to have to work, which is what lots of people do, to put food on the table to


790

00:48:00,920 --> 00:48:05,620

allow them to go to said parties to buy gifts for these friends.


791

00:48:05,620 --> 00:48:12,380

So I'm trying to consciously, if I hear myself say, oh, I'm such a bad mom, I say, actually,


792

00:48:12,380 --> 00:48:14,820

no, I'm just a little overwhelmed mom.


793

00:48:14,820 --> 00:48:15,820

Yeah.


794

00:48:15,820 --> 00:48:17,580

I try and rephrase it.


795

00:48:17,580 --> 00:48:22,980

And I tell them that I still apologize because I think it's right to, you know, recognize


796

00:48:22,980 --> 00:48:27,140

their feelings and that they're frustrated because they can't go to that party or whatever.


797

00:48:27,140 --> 00:48:33,580

But I still, I try and say to them, you know, I'm not a bad person and I shouldn't feel


798

00:48:33,580 --> 00:48:34,980

guilty about it.


799

00:48:34,980 --> 00:48:40,700

I feel sorry that I can't fulfill your desire today, but maybe we could do it tomorrow.


800

00:48:40,700 --> 00:48:42,700

Yeah, yeah.


801

00:48:42,700 --> 00:48:45,460

But you know, and I'm trying to consciously do that.


802

00:48:45,460 --> 00:48:49,460

It's like, you know, when you see yourself in the mirror, you're like, oh, the flab,


803

00:48:49,460 --> 00:48:53,380

you know, and it's like, no, this is my story.


804

00:48:53,380 --> 00:48:58,240

I had two kids, my belly has been stretched beyond compare and I'm impressed it's already


805

00:48:58,240 --> 00:49:00,740

gone back as much as it has.


806

00:49:00,740 --> 00:49:06,980

I should be impressed that I'm still not a watermelon, you know?


807

00:49:06,980 --> 00:49:09,260

Yeah, that's it, isn't it?


808

00:49:09,260 --> 00:49:10,260

Yeah.


809

00:49:10,260 --> 00:49:17,940

It's like, I'm trying to consciously change and reframe myself and my words because I


810

00:49:17,940 --> 00:49:20,260

know that they are going to affect them.


811

00:49:20,260 --> 00:49:26,160

And for when they decide to be moms, if they so choose to be moms, I don't want them to


812

00:49:26,160 --> 00:49:32,180

have to feel the weight of it from themselves because society is already going to put so


813

00:49:32,180 --> 00:49:33,180

much on them.


814

00:49:33,180 --> 00:49:35,180

Yeah, that's it, isn't it?


815

00:49:35,180 --> 00:49:36,180

Yeah.


816

00:49:36,180 --> 00:49:40,460

And I want them to feel safe in their own and safe in their own skin and in their own


817

00:49:40,460 --> 00:49:45,520

thoughts and being able to make their own choices and not feel bad that their choice


818

00:49:45,520 --> 00:49:50,180

is going to go against the grain for person X or person Y.


819

00:49:50,180 --> 00:49:53,900

Doesn't matter because it'll be fine for person A, you know?


820

00:49:53,900 --> 00:49:56,100

Yeah, no, I could on you.


821

00:49:56,100 --> 00:49:57,100

That's very inspiring.


822

00:49:57,100 --> 00:49:59,140

That was very long and rambly.


823

00:49:59,140 --> 00:50:02,980

No, no, that was great because yeah, that's the thing.


824

00:50:02,980 --> 00:50:07,300

If we're in tune enough to be able to catch these thoughts, whatever they may be, but


825

00:50:07,300 --> 00:50:11,520

particularly around guilt, I think is really important because we are literally fighting


826

00:50:11,520 --> 00:50:12,520

an uphill battle.


827

00:50:12,520 --> 00:50:17,300

Like you said, the scales are tipped against us.


828

00:50:17,300 --> 00:50:18,740

They're not in our favor.


829

00:50:18,740 --> 00:50:22,460

And anything we do is going to be judged by somebody else, whether it's in real life or


830

00:50:22,460 --> 00:50:28,860

on the internet or, you know, we judge ourselves by what we see someone's doing on Instagram.


831

00:50:28,860 --> 00:50:31,980

If we can catch that and go, actually hang on a minute.


832

00:50:31,980 --> 00:50:34,340

I'm actually a really good mom.


833

00:50:34,340 --> 00:50:38,740

And like I said, overwhelmed at the minute or I'm just having a bit of an off day or


834

00:50:38,740 --> 00:50:40,420

whoops, never mind.


835

00:50:40,420 --> 00:50:45,900

Like, you know, like just giving ourselves a break, cutting ourselves some slack and


836

00:50:45,900 --> 00:50:48,660

not being so hard on ourselves, I think.


837

00:50:48,660 --> 00:50:49,660

That's true.


838

00:50:49,660 --> 00:50:50,660

Yeah.


839

00:50:50,660 --> 00:50:52,780

It's frustrating because you want to do it all.


840

00:50:52,780 --> 00:50:57,500

Maybe your brain wants to do it all, but your body can't handle it and time constraints


841

00:50:57,500 --> 00:50:58,740

just can't do it.


842

00:50:58,740 --> 00:51:05,540

And it's also being kind to yourself and realizing that you can't juggle everything.


843

00:51:05,540 --> 00:51:11,380

And I think that's the first step is to recognize that we are not machines.


844

00:51:11,380 --> 00:51:17,740

We are human and we can only do so much with what we have.


845

00:51:17,740 --> 00:51:18,740

That's it, isn't it?


846

00:51:18,740 --> 00:51:23,900

And being mindful that, you know, when we're being told these things, you know, particularly


847

00:51:23,900 --> 00:51:31,580

from women or whoever's from other generations, when they raised children, it was a completely


848

00:51:31,580 --> 00:51:33,300

different social setup.


849

00:51:33,300 --> 00:51:37,340

You know, there wasn't two parents usually working.


850

00:51:37,340 --> 00:51:40,500

It was one parent at the home all the time.


851

00:51:40,500 --> 00:51:46,780

And so, you know, maybe things were different and achievable on different levels.


852

00:51:46,780 --> 00:51:51,660

So yeah, putting things in context, I think can be useful and not just taking somebody's


853

00:51:51,660 --> 00:51:54,340

advice and going, oh no, I can't do that.


854

00:51:54,340 --> 00:51:55,340

I must be really bad.


855

00:51:55,340 --> 00:51:59,820

It's like, actually, the world has changed a lot since then or whatever it might be,


856

00:51:59,820 --> 00:52:00,820

you know.


857

00:52:00,820 --> 00:52:01,820

Yeah.


858

00:52:01,820 --> 00:52:02,820

I don't know.


859

00:52:02,820 --> 00:52:05,980

You feel like you're damned if you do and you're damned if you don't, don't you?


860

00:52:05,980 --> 00:52:07,460

But it is, that's what it is.


861

00:52:07,460 --> 00:52:09,020

We have to do what's right for you.


862

00:52:09,020 --> 00:52:10,020

Yeah, you do.


863

00:52:10,020 --> 00:52:15,620

And as long as you're a good person overall, it shouldn't really matter how you do it.


864

00:52:15,620 --> 00:52:20,020

Yeah, as long as you and your family and your children are all happy.


865

00:52:20,020 --> 00:52:21,020

Yeah.


866

00:52:21,020 --> 00:52:22,020

Stuff for everyone else.


867

00:52:22,020 --> 00:52:23,020

Yeah, pretty much.


868

00:52:23,020 --> 00:52:50,020

Yeah.


869

00:52:50,020 --> 00:52:54,820

Okay, so in terms of like what influences you with your photography, like you talk about


870

00:52:54,820 --> 00:52:59,540

doing your own, you've done your own projects when you first sort of picked up the camera


871

00:52:59,540 --> 00:53:04,500

and you're taking pictures of nature or, you know, things in the world and things like


872

00:53:04,500 --> 00:53:06,740

just as from your perspective.


873

00:53:06,740 --> 00:53:11,740

Have you found that since you became a mum that maybe what you're looking at is different


874

00:53:11,740 --> 00:53:14,620

or what's influencing you is different?


875

00:53:14,620 --> 00:53:15,620

Absolutely.


876

00:53:15,620 --> 00:53:21,900

You know, if I had kids, I would go on lots of hikes and I was interested in taking pictures


877

00:53:21,900 --> 00:53:29,260

of butterflies and pretty flowers and light and landscapes and the water and whatever


878

00:53:29,260 --> 00:53:34,880

else happened by or when I was traveling, obviously, you know, there's like 4,000 pictures


879

00:53:34,880 --> 00:53:39,380

of the Eiffel Tower from when I went to Paris because that's what you do.


880

00:53:39,380 --> 00:53:44,780

And that's what I was doing, you know, different angles, random things, experimenting, everything.


881

00:53:44,780 --> 00:53:52,100

But you know, I would just kind of focused on that.


882

00:53:52,100 --> 00:53:58,500

Like I was thinking about taking pretty things, pretty pictures, and there wasn't really a


883

00:53:58,500 --> 00:54:03,780

meaning or anything deeper in the images.


884

00:54:03,780 --> 00:54:06,300

I just liked the photographic medium.


885

00:54:06,300 --> 00:54:11,260

I liked how I could express with it and play with it, but I didn't necessarily want to


886

00:54:11,260 --> 00:54:13,900

say anything with it.


887

00:54:13,900 --> 00:54:17,140

If that makes sense.


888

00:54:17,140 --> 00:54:23,900

I did have some brief moments when I turned 30 where I was like, oh, I'm getting old.


889

00:54:23,900 --> 00:54:30,940

And I wanted to, I started to experiment with some self-portraiture a little bit just to


890

00:54:30,940 --> 00:54:34,220

see how I was changing and how things were going.


891

00:54:34,220 --> 00:54:39,900

I was getting to that age where, you know, I had just gotten married and I was wanting


892

00:54:39,900 --> 00:54:45,820

to start a family, so I wanted to start kind of documenting me and how I was going to change.


893

00:54:45,820 --> 00:54:50,500

And so that's, I would say that 30 is when I started to try and say something with my


894

00:54:50,500 --> 00:54:54,580

photography, whether I was good at it or not, it's a whole different story.


895

00:54:54,580 --> 00:55:01,780

But I did try and do something specific with my work.


896

00:55:01,780 --> 00:55:06,540

And so I started kind of experimenting on, you know, trying to do self-portraits with


897

00:55:06,540 --> 00:55:10,340

what I had and all that kind of stuff.


898

00:55:10,340 --> 00:55:16,860

Then I had baby number one and baby number one became the center focus of everything.


899

00:55:16,860 --> 00:55:22,060

It was documenting every moment, you know, look at the spit bubble, how cute.


900

00:55:22,060 --> 00:55:27,900

And you know, it's like, you know, and then I started to follow like all these moms on


901

00:55:27,900 --> 00:55:31,660

Instagram doing all these cool things with their babies and these photographers, other


902

00:55:31,660 --> 00:55:32,900

things doing stuff.


903

00:55:32,900 --> 00:55:41,420

And also I was trying to launch the business and so my personal photography kind of got


904

00:55:41,420 --> 00:55:48,900

set aside and it was only just taking pictures of the kids as they started to grow and develop.


905

00:55:48,900 --> 00:55:51,820

And then at a certain point, something else clicked.


906

00:55:51,820 --> 00:55:56,580

And I think it's when they started to, you know, question things again, after they were


907

00:55:56,580 --> 00:56:02,300

that little needy ball of stuff that just needed you 100% when started to talk.


908

00:56:02,300 --> 00:56:06,180

And have tiny little conversations in their own way.


909

00:56:06,180 --> 00:56:14,340

And they started asking me things and I was like, you know, that's a very good question.


910

00:56:14,340 --> 00:56:18,460

Children have an unfiltered view of the world and they ask things they don't care about


911

00:56:18,460 --> 00:56:20,540

matters or whatever.


912

00:56:20,540 --> 00:56:26,380

And you know, and it really started when one of my daughters, she saw I was just getting


913

00:56:26,380 --> 00:56:31,300

changed and she saw my stretch marks on my belly and she's like, mommy, what are those?


914

00:56:31,300 --> 00:56:32,780

And I said, oh, they're stretch marks.


915

00:56:32,780 --> 00:56:34,340

And she's like, what's a stretch mark?


916

00:56:34,340 --> 00:56:35,340

Because as you do.


917

00:56:35,340 --> 00:56:39,860

And I said, oh, it's what happens when you have a, when your belly grows.


918

00:56:39,860 --> 00:56:43,580

And usually when you have a baby because your skin stretches, but it doesn't go back together


919

00:56:43,580 --> 00:56:44,580

again.


920

00:56:44,580 --> 00:56:48,260

And she's like, do you like them?


921

00:56:48,260 --> 00:56:51,780

And I was like, that is a very good question.


922

00:56:51,780 --> 00:56:53,300

Do I like them?


923

00:56:53,300 --> 00:56:54,640

And it got me thinking.


924

00:56:54,640 --> 00:56:59,220

And so I randomly took pictures of my stretch marks.


925

00:56:59,220 --> 00:57:08,060

You know, and I started this kind of idea of taking self portraits of me as I am now,


926

00:57:08,060 --> 00:57:14,060

you know, with the saggy belly, with the, you know, using it as like a therapy for my


927

00:57:14,060 --> 00:57:19,180

frustrations because as I said, I was all mom and business and I didn't do personal


928

00:57:19,180 --> 00:57:20,180

work.


929

00:57:20,180 --> 00:57:23,300

So this was one of my first steps was taking self portraits.


930

00:57:23,300 --> 00:57:28,660

And I started doing a series of self portraits, which are still ongoing.


931

00:57:28,660 --> 00:57:34,180

And I think I'll probably end up doing them my whole life because I will keep changing.


932

00:57:34,180 --> 00:57:38,820

And I love to see how they've changed and how I've changed.


933

00:57:38,820 --> 00:57:40,540

Even my body has changed.


934

00:57:40,540 --> 00:57:44,340

And sometimes you see yourself in a certain way and then you see yourself in a picture


935

00:57:44,340 --> 00:57:47,980

and you're like, wow, that's nothing like I see myself.


936

00:57:47,980 --> 00:57:50,060

And sometimes it's a good thing.


937

00:57:50,060 --> 00:57:53,020

Sometimes it's not such a good thing.


938

00:57:53,020 --> 00:57:57,500

You know, but, but it's still, it's made me think about, I can actually say something


939

00:57:57,500 --> 00:57:59,580

with what I want to do.


940

00:57:59,580 --> 00:58:06,140

So I started doing personal, just thinking of something on the theme and doing personal


941

00:58:06,140 --> 00:58:07,140

work.


942

00:58:07,140 --> 00:58:11,740

And so my self portraits has been a big ongoing one.


943

00:58:11,740 --> 00:58:20,460

Another one that I have been doing slowly is exploring the concept of what family is.


944

00:58:20,460 --> 00:58:22,380

And it's called the We Are Family Project.


945

00:58:22,380 --> 00:58:27,420

And basically I'm out photographing families using creative lenses, but families that are


946

00:58:27,420 --> 00:58:31,060

mom, dad, and 2.5 kids and a cat and dog.


947

00:58:31,060 --> 00:58:36,460

So yeah, of course there's a family with mom and dad and 2.5 kids and a dog.


948

00:58:36,460 --> 00:58:42,820

And then there's a family with just one mom, or there's a family with two moms, or there's


949

00:58:42,820 --> 00:58:48,260

a family with no kids, just the dog, or there's a family with a child with special needs, you


950

00:58:48,260 --> 00:58:55,580

know, and I'm trying to photograph as much diversity of what family is.


951

00:58:55,580 --> 00:58:59,900

And it reminds me of that episode of your podcast episode where you interviewed that


952

00:58:59,900 --> 00:59:03,700

lady that had IVF and she decided to be a mom.


953

00:59:03,700 --> 00:59:04,700

Yes, Alisha.


954

00:59:04,700 --> 00:59:05,700

It was Alisha.


955

00:59:05,700 --> 00:59:06,700

Yeah.


956

00:59:06,700 --> 00:59:12,740

And she talked about her IVF journey and how she was writing a book, I think, about normalizing


957

00:59:12,740 --> 00:59:13,740

family.


958

00:59:13,740 --> 00:59:18,580

And I was like, oh, and it's like, I was like, see, that's in the lines of my project.


959

00:59:18,580 --> 00:59:21,060

It's to normalize what family is.


960

00:59:21,060 --> 00:59:22,860

Family can be anything.


961

00:59:22,860 --> 00:59:24,340

Family can be multi-generations.


962

00:59:24,340 --> 00:59:30,020

I had a family where mom was living with her single daughter and her two kids, and that


963

00:59:30,020 --> 00:59:31,980

was the family.


964

00:59:31,980 --> 00:59:36,860

So I've been working on that project as well slowly over the years.


965

00:59:36,860 --> 00:59:43,100

I've done a few families and I'm recently starting a new one that I'm actually photographing


966

00:59:43,100 --> 00:59:47,180

my first model for today.


967

00:59:47,180 --> 00:59:51,620

And I'm calling it the Kintsugi Mama project and it has to do with stretch marks.


968

00:59:51,620 --> 00:59:53,140

Yeah, right.


969

00:59:53,140 --> 00:59:57,660

So it came from, and it's kind of been simmering in the back there for a few years, from when


970

00:59:57,660 --> 01:00:00,060

my daughter asked me about the stretch marks.


971

01:00:00,060 --> 01:00:05,460

And then one day I told her that, you know what, I thought about your question and I


972

01:00:05,460 --> 01:00:11,100

think I like my stretch marks because they're the story of you and your sister.


973

01:00:11,100 --> 01:00:14,700

And my skin broke, but it healed together.


974

01:00:14,700 --> 01:00:20,100

And then I found out about this Japanese practice of Kintsugi, which is repairing broken pottery


975

01:00:20,100 --> 01:00:21,100

with gold.


976

01:00:21,100 --> 01:00:22,700

I don't know if you've heard of it.


977

01:00:22,700 --> 01:00:23,700

Yeah.


978

01:00:23,700 --> 01:00:24,700

Yeah.


979

01:00:24,700 --> 01:00:28,220

And I was like, they work, they work together.


980

01:00:28,220 --> 01:00:32,260

So I got in touch with a friend of mine who's a face painter and I'm like, I need gold face


981

01:00:32,260 --> 01:00:34,300

paint that's safe and this and that.


982

01:00:34,300 --> 01:00:37,460

I've got this idea and I need to do it.


983

01:00:37,460 --> 01:00:43,820

And so I sat down and very trickly with a mirror painted my own stretch marks in gold


984

01:00:43,820 --> 01:00:46,180

face paint and I photographed it.


985

01:00:46,180 --> 01:00:48,900

And I said, this is the beginning of a new project.


986

01:00:48,900 --> 01:00:50,460

It's not just my stretch marks.


987

01:00:50,460 --> 01:00:58,180

All of our stretch marks, whether we have two or 4,000, they tell our story and they


988

01:00:58,180 --> 01:01:03,060

are when our body broke and it fixed itself and fixed itself in a beautiful way.


989

01:01:03,060 --> 01:01:04,620

And it's something I want to highlight.


990

01:01:04,620 --> 01:01:12,860

So I've called in a few moms of all shapes and sizes and I am painting their stretch


991

01:01:12,860 --> 01:01:15,740

marks in gold and photographing it.


992

01:01:15,740 --> 01:01:17,420

I love it.


993

01:01:17,420 --> 01:01:18,420

Photographing them.


994

01:01:18,420 --> 01:01:20,220

And so I'm super excited about this.


995

01:01:20,220 --> 01:01:21,220

I had to put it off.


996

01:01:21,220 --> 01:01:25,580

I was supposed to do it last week, but I had a surgery and recovery took way too long.


997

01:01:25,580 --> 01:01:30,020

And so I'm doing it again this week and I'm super excited to be doing that.


998

01:01:30,020 --> 01:01:35,380

And I have something to say and I think we all have something to say.


999

01:01:35,380 --> 01:01:36,820

And it goes into so many things.


1000

01:01:36,820 --> 01:01:43,820

It goes into Bosby positive and mom positive and empowering us to appreciate what our bodies


1001

01:01:43,820 --> 01:01:44,820

do.


1002

01:01:44,820 --> 01:01:52,100

Society is like we're all airbrushed and photoshopped and no, we aren't.


1003

01:01:52,100 --> 01:01:53,100

Yeah.


1004

01:01:53,100 --> 01:01:54,100

Yeah.


1005

01:01:54,100 --> 01:01:55,740

No, I absolutely love that.


1006

01:01:55,740 --> 01:01:59,620

I just, it's actually made me a little bit emotional to be honest, because I just think


1007

01:01:59,620 --> 01:02:06,020

I resonate with that so deeply that society wants us to fix, to be fixed and to not look


1008

01:02:06,020 --> 01:02:08,740

like we've ever gone through anything bad.


1009

01:02:08,740 --> 01:02:13,340

We have to hold up this perfect persona or perception of ourselves.


1010

01:02:13,340 --> 01:02:19,020

It's like, why are we so afraid to hide these parts of us that show the amazing things we've


1011

01:02:19,020 --> 01:02:20,020

done?


1012

01:02:20,020 --> 01:02:26,220

You know, it's pretty bloody amazing to have to carry a child and to birth a child.


1013

01:02:26,220 --> 01:02:31,660

It's just like, why do we have to hide that and be afraid of what people, I don't know.


1014

01:02:31,660 --> 01:02:34,940

To me it's patriarchy, but anyway, that's my take on it.


1015

01:02:34,940 --> 01:02:36,940

Cause we would have to be perfect.


1016

01:02:36,940 --> 01:02:38,940

We do it to ourselves as well.


1017

01:02:38,940 --> 01:02:39,940

Yeah, we do.


1018

01:02:39,940 --> 01:02:40,940

We play into that.


1019

01:02:40,940 --> 01:02:41,940

We do it.


1020

01:02:41,940 --> 01:02:42,940

It's not just men.


1021

01:02:42,940 --> 01:02:47,620

It was just men and the patriarchy and it's conditioned generations and generations and


1022

01:02:47,620 --> 01:02:51,100

generations of women, but we do it to ourselves.


1023

01:02:51,100 --> 01:02:57,980

I mean, I know lots of amazing photographers and I'm not to, you know, lessen their work


1024

01:02:57,980 --> 01:03:05,340

or anything, but they do these maternity photos that are, oh my God, they're stunning.


1025

01:03:05,340 --> 01:03:11,100

And these women have porcelain skin, smooth skin, not a blemish.


1026

01:03:11,100 --> 01:03:17,700

I mean, it looks, well, they're like models, beautiful models with flowing dresses and


1027

01:03:17,700 --> 01:03:19,740

a perfect bump.


1028

01:03:19,740 --> 01:03:22,100

And they look amazing.


1029

01:03:22,100 --> 01:03:25,020

And that's great because that's what they want them to look like.


1030

01:03:25,020 --> 01:03:28,520

These women have gone to these people because that's what they want to feel.


1031

01:03:28,520 --> 01:03:33,340

But then when you're done and you look at yourself and you look at that picture you


1032

01:03:33,340 --> 01:03:38,620

have on the wall, is that really you?


1033

01:03:38,620 --> 01:03:43,780

And are you appreciating you for you or are you appreciating you for that glorious portrait


1034

01:03:43,780 --> 01:03:46,700

that you've had done, which is beautiful.


1035

01:03:46,700 --> 01:03:53,420

And I love that, you know, we can as photographers do this and make someone feel how amazing


1036

01:03:53,420 --> 01:03:56,900

they truly are if they can look past their imperfections.


1037

01:03:56,900 --> 01:04:02,580

I think you can see that as one of the reasons behind that kind of very photoshopped kind


1038

01:04:02,580 --> 01:04:05,180

of photography.


1039

01:04:05,180 --> 01:04:08,020

But I prefer to say, I'm not, don't need to see past it.


1040

01:04:08,020 --> 01:04:09,380

I need to embrace it.


1041

01:04:09,380 --> 01:04:14,540

And it's been part of my own journey doing this and doing these projects and part of


1042

01:04:14,540 --> 01:04:20,620

my own personal journey as well to accepting my body for what it is and understanding that


1043

01:04:20,620 --> 01:04:25,520

it's a map of my life and it's my story and that of my children, it connects me to them.


1044

01:04:25,520 --> 01:04:31,420

Those stretch marks, each one of those connects me to one of my kids.


1045

01:04:31,420 --> 01:04:35,860

And I think that it's so important to help other people to understand that as well.


1046

01:04:35,860 --> 01:04:43,260

So I'm really hoping that this project will take off and become something a bit more and


1047

01:04:43,260 --> 01:04:47,940

take, you know, I don't know, I don't know where it's going to go, but I'm hoping that


1048

01:04:47,940 --> 01:04:50,340

it will make an impact on someone somewhere.


1049

01:04:50,340 --> 01:04:51,340

Oh, I love it.


1050

01:04:51,340 --> 01:04:53,500

I just think it's just so wonderful.


1051

01:04:53,500 --> 01:04:58,700

Honestly, I wish I was closer to you because I'd let you paint mine.


1052

01:04:58,700 --> 01:05:02,900

I would love to have you if you ever come and brought over this way and decided the


1053

01:05:02,900 --> 01:05:05,780

world stopped by and I will happily add you.


1054

01:05:05,780 --> 01:05:08,220

Yeah, no, I love, I just love that.


1055

01:05:08,220 --> 01:05:12,300

I think, yeah, like I said, sorry, I'm getting, I'm getting a bit emotional because I just


1056

01:05:12,300 --> 01:05:18,220

think it's, oh, I don't know, maybe it's because I'm getting tired, but you know what I mean?


1057

01:05:18,220 --> 01:05:19,220

I am sorry.


1058

01:05:19,220 --> 01:05:20,580

No, no, it's good.


1059

01:05:20,580 --> 01:05:28,380

I just, the more people that can do stuff like what you're doing and also the, your


1060

01:05:28,380 --> 01:05:34,540

models, you know, to be able to put themselves out there too, that's massive.


1061

01:05:34,540 --> 01:05:38,460

You know, like that takes, like you've said, you're, you know, through your work, it's


1062

01:05:38,460 --> 01:05:42,540

you working through things for someone to rock up and say, yep, no worries.


1063

01:05:42,540 --> 01:05:43,540

Here I am.


1064

01:05:43,540 --> 01:05:44,540

Put me out there.


1065

01:05:44,540 --> 01:05:46,540

You know, it's, it's a big thing.


1066

01:05:46,540 --> 01:05:53,540

I mean, when I did the model call, I posted and shared it in a local breastfeeding group


1067

01:05:53,540 --> 01:05:57,340

that I'm part of still from when I was feeding my girls.


1068

01:05:57,340 --> 01:06:01,860

And you know, I had a lot of people interested in the concept, but then when I explained


1069

01:06:01,860 --> 01:06:05,940

exactly what it was going to be, a lot of people said, I'm not ready for that yet.


1070

01:06:05,940 --> 01:06:06,940

And that's okay.


1071

01:06:06,940 --> 01:06:10,420

They said, I might be after, and I'm like, that's okay.


1072

01:06:10,420 --> 01:06:13,260

It doesn't matter when you're ready.


1073

01:06:13,260 --> 01:06:15,340

You let me know and we'll do this.


1074

01:06:15,340 --> 01:06:18,340

And I had others say, yeah, let's do it, man.


1075

01:06:18,340 --> 01:06:23,900

I'm totally wanting to work on my image and I want to, I want to help myself.


1076

01:06:23,900 --> 01:06:28,100

And they see it as part of something that they can work on together too.


1077

01:06:28,100 --> 01:06:29,380

And that's okay too.


1078

01:06:29,380 --> 01:06:35,020

And when you're ready, it's very hard for us to accept ourselves as we are, no matter


1079

01:06:35,020 --> 01:06:42,660

what shape, size we are, you know, how we see ourselves or how we want to see ourselves.


1080

01:06:42,660 --> 01:06:49,980

It's so, so very different from what we really are.


1081

01:06:49,980 --> 01:06:53,660

I don't know if that makes any sense at all, but yeah.


1082

01:06:53,660 --> 01:06:54,660

Yeah.


1083

01:06:54,660 --> 01:06:59,780

And the way that people actually see us, I think is it can be really different from how


1084

01:06:59,780 --> 01:07:01,700

we want to be seen.


1085

01:07:01,700 --> 01:07:08,020

So you know, we put these fields like Instagram or TikTok, I'm not on TikTok, but you know,


1086

01:07:08,020 --> 01:07:14,860

we put these filters on to try and, you know, create this artificial way of presenting ourselves


1087

01:07:14,860 --> 01:07:17,980

because we think people will like that more or you know what I mean?


1088

01:07:17,980 --> 01:07:22,820

Like it's just, I know it's a bit disturbing really, when you think about it, like we had,


1089

01:07:22,820 --> 01:07:29,300

oh, you could go down a rabbit hole with all that stuff, you know, and talk about it for


1090

01:07:29,300 --> 01:07:31,580

ages and debate and everything.


1091

01:07:31,580 --> 01:07:33,580

So I just, yeah.


1092

01:07:33,580 --> 01:07:38,100

I think it's a good way to be here all day.


1093

01:07:38,100 --> 01:07:39,100

I know.


1094

01:07:39,100 --> 01:07:41,580

No, but look, what you're doing is amazing.


1095

01:07:41,580 --> 01:07:42,580

It really is.


1096

01:07:42,580 --> 01:07:46,140

If there is anyone that's in your neck of the woods that would like to get involved


1097

01:07:46,140 --> 01:07:50,740

in that, is your Instagram the best place to go or do you have...


1098

01:07:50,740 --> 01:07:56,420

Yeah, I have, I've created a little account for it on my Instagram.


1099

01:07:56,420 --> 01:07:59,300

It's called Kintsugi Mama Project.


1100

01:07:59,300 --> 01:08:03,820

I can send it to you when I send you all the links and stuff.


1101

01:08:03,820 --> 01:08:05,740

Yeah, that would be great.


1102

01:08:05,740 --> 01:08:06,740

Yeah.


1103

01:08:06,740 --> 01:08:07,740

And it's on there.


1104

01:08:07,740 --> 01:08:11,940

Of course I've already, I've shared it also on my personal work profile, which is life


1105

01:08:11,940 --> 01:08:20,540

is wild and free, but Instagram took it down because it promoted, you know, something.


1106

01:08:20,540 --> 01:08:22,500

Oh for goodness sake.


1107

01:08:22,500 --> 01:08:25,220

That's part of the problem, isn't it?


1108

01:08:25,220 --> 01:08:26,940

Yeah, it is.


1109

01:08:26,940 --> 01:08:30,540

Because that account, I think, has more followers.


1110

01:08:30,540 --> 01:08:32,100

So someone must have reported it.


1111

01:08:32,100 --> 01:08:35,860

It must have bothered someone to see my belly in gold.


1112

01:08:35,860 --> 01:08:38,820

Oh for God's sake.


1113

01:08:38,820 --> 01:08:44,580

But that picture is still on the Kintsugi Mama one because it's a smaller number of


1114

01:08:44,580 --> 01:08:45,580

followers.


1115

01:08:45,580 --> 01:08:47,780

It probably hasn't peaked anyone's attention yet.


1116

01:08:47,780 --> 01:08:50,820

So at the moment, it's still there.


1117

01:08:50,820 --> 01:08:56,900

I can foresee that I will have some trouble sharing some of these pieces uncensored on


1118

01:08:56,900 --> 01:08:58,900

Instagram.


1119

01:08:58,900 --> 01:09:05,420

So I am going to be setting up a section on my website for it because that's mine and


1120

01:09:05,420 --> 01:09:09,940

I can decide what I share and what I don't and no one can take it down.


1121

01:09:09,940 --> 01:09:12,100

Yeah, as far as I know.


1122

01:09:12,100 --> 01:09:14,860

So I will be doing that to share a bit more of it.


1123

01:09:14,860 --> 01:09:21,300

But as it stands at the moment, it is just on Instagram and I have a little newsletter


1124

01:09:21,300 --> 01:09:26,020

that I started writing for the ones that answered the model call and stuff to keep them updated


1125

01:09:26,020 --> 01:09:28,140

on how the project is doing.


1126

01:09:28,140 --> 01:09:33,180

But I'll be developing that as it comes to help and also get subscribers on that list


1127

01:09:33,180 --> 01:09:38,780

so people can follow it without having to be worrying about what Facebook or Instagram


1128

01:09:38,780 --> 01:09:46,100

or TikTok or whatever platform you have as their personal opinion on a woman's body.


1129

01:09:46,100 --> 01:09:47,100

So yeah.


1130

01:09:47,100 --> 01:09:50,100

Yeah, but I don't know.


1131

01:09:50,100 --> 01:09:53,380

Yeah, we could talk about this or not.


1132

01:09:53,380 --> 01:09:56,300

It just really frustrates me.


1133

01:09:56,300 --> 01:10:02,220

Anyway, I'll put all the links in the show notes so people can click away and keep updated.


1134

01:10:02,220 --> 01:10:03,940

And I think that's wonderful and all the best with it.


1135

01:10:03,940 --> 01:10:06,820

I really think that is amazing.


1136

01:10:06,820 --> 01:10:08,860

I really like it is and I love the tie in.


1137

01:10:08,860 --> 01:10:12,620

I love how your mind went there to bring those two ideas together.


1138

01:10:12,620 --> 01:10:13,620

I think that's brilliant.


1139

01:10:13,620 --> 01:10:14,620

Oh yeah.


1140

01:10:14,620 --> 01:10:17,060

Oh, it's fun to follow the brain, isn't it?


1141

01:10:17,060 --> 01:10:21,060

It's just like these two random things like I can do something with that.


1142

01:10:21,060 --> 01:10:22,060

Oh yeah.


1143

01:10:22,060 --> 01:10:23,060

Yeah.


1144

01:10:23,060 --> 01:10:26,900

I love moments like that where you get something and then you sort of go, oh, now this is something,


1145

01:10:26,900 --> 01:10:29,540

you know, because you always got stuff going through your head.


1146

01:10:29,540 --> 01:10:33,620

And then it's like you stop and go, oh yeah, oh, I like that one.


1147

01:10:33,620 --> 01:10:36,020

You know what I mean?


1148

01:10:36,020 --> 01:10:37,420

That's the one I'm going to cling to.


1149

01:10:37,420 --> 01:10:38,420

Yeah.


1150

01:10:38,420 --> 01:10:40,580

Because you have so many things and it's like you can't do them all.


1151

01:10:40,580 --> 01:10:41,580

Yeah.


1152

01:10:41,580 --> 01:10:45,500

You can't do them all well, but the one that really sings to you, that all comes together


1153

01:10:45,500 --> 01:10:47,500

and you're like, that's the one.


1154

01:10:47,500 --> 01:10:48,940

That's the one you're doing.


1155

01:10:48,940 --> 01:10:49,940

Yeah.


1156

01:10:49,940 --> 01:10:50,940

So that's what I'm going with now.


1157

01:10:50,940 --> 01:10:51,940

Good on you.


1158

01:10:51,940 --> 01:10:52,940

I love that.


1159

01:10:52,940 --> 01:10:53,940

I actually had a moment like that.


1160

01:10:53,940 --> 01:10:59,420

I went to Adelaide, which is like the capital city of my state over the weekend by myself,


1161

01:10:59,420 --> 01:11:02,020

totally by myself, no children, no husband.


1162

01:11:02,020 --> 01:11:06,860

It was just amazing because I had a singing gig on in the city and driving home, I had


1163

01:11:06,860 --> 01:11:09,780

one of those moments where I just was listening to a song.


1164

01:11:09,780 --> 01:11:11,300

So I'm a massive Beatles fan.


1165

01:11:11,300 --> 01:11:14,900

So I was listening to the Beatles and all of a sudden I had this idea.


1166

01:11:14,900 --> 01:11:19,220

And by the time I'd gotten home, I'd planned this whole idea for my album I'm going to


1167

01:11:19,220 --> 01:11:20,940

do and all these songs I'm going to do.


1168

01:11:20,940 --> 01:11:25,020

And it's like, you know, just things just, once they start, they just go and go and go.


1169

01:11:25,020 --> 01:11:27,100

And now I've got to try and find time to do it.


1170

01:11:27,100 --> 01:11:28,100

That's the next thing.


1171

01:11:28,100 --> 01:11:29,100

Yeah, that's true.


1172

01:11:29,100 --> 01:11:30,100

Yeah.


1173

01:11:30,100 --> 01:11:35,420

I find that if I write it down, I'm able to get it out of my head and then I can actually


1174

01:11:35,420 --> 01:11:37,480

still remember the stuff.


1175

01:11:37,480 --> 01:11:42,460

So I have a notebook because mine come right before I'm about to fall asleep.


1176

01:11:42,460 --> 01:11:43,460

Yes.


1177

01:11:43,460 --> 01:11:44,460

Yep.


1178

01:11:44,460 --> 01:11:45,460

Yep.


1179

01:11:45,460 --> 01:11:46,460

Or when I'm driving, that's another one.


1180

01:11:46,460 --> 01:11:50,460

So I always have a little notebook and a pen near my bed.


1181

01:11:50,460 --> 01:11:54,220

And when I wake up with this great idea and I'm like, got to write it down, got to write


1182

01:11:54,220 --> 01:11:55,220

down before I forget it.


1183

01:11:55,220 --> 01:11:56,700

And then I'm like, I can sleep now.


1184

01:11:56,700 --> 01:12:02,260

And then the next day I could sit down and focus on it and just do what I got to do to


1185

01:12:02,260 --> 01:12:07,260

make it happen.


1186

01:12:07,260 --> 01:12:16,220

Yeah, no, thanks for sharing like what you've got coming up to the things you're working


1187

01:12:16,220 --> 01:12:17,220

on.


1188

01:12:17,220 --> 01:12:19,420

Cause that's something I think I like to know what people are up to.


1189

01:12:19,420 --> 01:12:24,300

And then people can, if they, you know, pique their interests, they can follow along and


1190

01:12:24,300 --> 01:12:25,300

see what's going on.


1191

01:12:25,300 --> 01:12:26,300

Yeah, absolutely.


1192

01:12:26,300 --> 01:12:28,100

And I'm sure you're following along on that project.


1193

01:12:28,100 --> 01:12:30,740

That's just spectacular.


1194

01:12:30,740 --> 01:12:34,860

I hope that it will speak to you and others as well.


1195

01:12:34,860 --> 01:12:40,020

And yeah, I hope that it will develop and grow into something a bit more than just an


1196

01:12:40,020 --> 01:12:41,020

Instagram account.


1197

01:12:41,020 --> 01:12:45,540

I could keep the account and don't get banned off of it.


1198

01:12:45,540 --> 01:12:49,060

Oh gee, now good on you.


1199

01:12:49,060 --> 01:12:51,580

Thank you so much for coming on.


1200

01:12:51,580 --> 01:12:52,580

I've just had such a...


1201

01:12:52,580 --> 01:12:53,580

Thank you so much for having me.


1202

01:12:53,580 --> 01:12:54,580

It's been an amazing impact.


1203

01:12:54,580 --> 01:12:55,580

It's been a pleasure.


1204

01:12:55,580 --> 01:12:56,580

It has, it's been lovely.


1205

01:12:56,580 --> 01:13:00,420

And I feel like now I'm starting to get like sore cheeks from laughing.


1206

01:13:00,420 --> 01:13:06,620

You know, you smile so much, you're like, which is a great sign of a great chat.


1207

01:13:06,620 --> 01:13:08,740

Thank you and all the best.


1208

01:13:08,740 --> 01:13:13,300

And I'm really inspired by what you're doing.


1209

01:13:13,300 --> 01:13:14,620

Good for you.


1210

01:13:14,620 --> 01:13:15,620

Really awesome.


1211

01:13:15,620 --> 01:13:16,620

That's awesome.


1212

01:13:16,620 --> 01:13:17,620

I'm so happy.


1213

01:13:17,620 --> 01:13:23,100

Cause you know, knowing that you can make just a difference for one person or to help


1214

01:13:23,100 --> 01:13:27,740

one person is huge and sometimes we forget about it because we're all like, oh, I need


1215

01:13:27,740 --> 01:13:32,820

to become like an established authority in my field and in order to be successful, right?


1216

01:13:32,820 --> 01:13:38,860

I need to have like millions of followers and have that little blue tick on my account.


1217

01:13:38,860 --> 01:13:41,740

And you know what?


1218

01:13:41,740 --> 01:13:42,740

It's all yes.


1219

01:13:42,740 --> 01:13:43,740

It is, isn't it?


1220

01:13:43,740 --> 01:13:44,740

It really is.


1221

01:13:44,740 --> 01:13:45,740

Yeah.


1222

01:13:45,740 --> 01:13:46,740

Yeah.


1223

01:13:46,740 --> 01:13:51,220

Because you can make a difference in your small, you're already making a difference


1224

01:13:51,220 --> 01:13:53,540

to someone in your family, aren't you?


1225

01:13:53,540 --> 01:13:54,540

You know?


1226

01:13:54,540 --> 01:13:55,540

I mean, yeah, that's so true.


1227

01:13:55,540 --> 01:13:57,020

I think we overlook that a lot, don't we?


1228

01:13:57,020 --> 01:14:03,380

We forget how powerful and how impactful we can be on that small circle of people that


1229

01:14:03,380 --> 01:14:04,380

live with us.


1230

01:14:04,380 --> 01:14:05,740

We don't need to be huge in the world.


1231

01:14:05,740 --> 01:14:09,860

I mean, it would be great to be able to make a huge difference, wouldn't it?


1232

01:14:09,860 --> 01:14:14,580

But even making it to like, you know, who would have thought my chat with you would


1233

01:14:14,580 --> 01:14:18,460

have helped inspire you all the way in Australia?


1234

01:14:18,460 --> 01:14:23,820

To maybe take that step and look at yourself in a different way.


1235

01:14:23,820 --> 01:14:25,860

I mean, who would have thought?


1236

01:14:25,860 --> 01:14:26,860

And yet there we go.


1237

01:14:26,860 --> 01:14:27,860

Yeah, that's it, isn't it?


1238

01:14:27,860 --> 01:14:31,340

And that makes me feel like I've accomplished today.


1239

01:14:31,340 --> 01:14:32,340

Yeah.


1240

01:14:32,340 --> 01:14:34,380

I love that.


1241

01:14:34,380 --> 01:14:40,140

It's another lesson on sort of adjusting our lens, I guess, of what our expectations


1242

01:14:40,140 --> 01:14:42,340

might be or what we want to achieve out of something.


1243

01:14:42,340 --> 01:14:43,620

Why are we doing what we're doing?


1244

01:14:43,620 --> 01:14:45,340

And yeah, I love that.


1245

01:14:45,340 --> 01:14:47,340

That's a whole other story, isn't it?


1246

01:14:47,340 --> 01:14:49,420

Just go on, go on, go on.


1247

01:14:49,420 --> 01:14:52,420

Oh my goodness.


1248

01:14:52,420 --> 01:14:54,300

Thanks for your company today.


1249

01:14:54,300 --> 01:14:59,700

If you've enjoyed this episode, I'd love you to consider leaving us a review, following


1250

01:14:59,700 --> 01:15:05,600

or subscribing to the podcast, or even sharing it with a friend you think might be interested.


1251

01:15:05,600 --> 01:15:09,600

If you or someone you know would like to be a guest on the podcast, please get in touch


1252

01:15:09,600 --> 01:15:12,220

with us by the link in the show notes.


1253

01:15:12,220 --> 01:15:18,220

The music you heard featured on today's episode was from Alemjo, which is my new age ambient


1254

01:15:18,220 --> 01:15:24,180

music trio comprised of myself, my sister Emma Anderson and her husband John.


1255

01:15:24,180 --> 01:15:28,380

If you'd like to hear more, you can find a link to us in the show notes.


1256

01:15:28,380 --> 01:15:43,820

I'll catch you again next week for another chat with an artistic mum.



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